Monday, February 13, 2006

Monday Random Batch O' Thoughts

Action packed week ahead – Meeting, ESL class, choir practice, class. That is how my evenings are going to be filled this week, but then on Friday I get a breather and we get out of work early for the three day weekend. Dinner at out house on Saturday with friends. Out on Sunday after church. Monday, scraping wallpaper off the bathroom walls. So much to do!

I have that stupid James Blunt song, “Beautiful,” in my head. Please make it stop!

Snow – I love snow. I love true winter. I love the beauty of the snow on the trees and on the cars and on the buildings and on the ground. I love the delicate ballet you have to go through to walk through the slush. I love weather! It’s February, so it is true and right and good and proper that it should be cold and snowy. When driving around yesterday, I saw kids and families sledding down the hill in front of the Masonic Temple in Alexandria. Kids making snowmen. Teens throwing snowballs. I wished I’d had a sled too, so I could pretend to be 10 years old again . . .

We let the Random Cat out onto the balcony to experience the snow . . . she did come outside and sniffed around a bit, but once she walked on it, that was enough. Back in the house! She wasn’t really fond of the wetness . . .

Number 1 Single – my new guilty pleasure show. I love Lisa Loeb anyway – if I was still single, I would aim for her quirky personality. I’m just glad I don’t ever have to date again – I hated it with a passion. I seemed to have the worst dates on the planet, and I fully expected to become a nun. Luckily, the universe sometimes puts the right people in your way at the right times . . . although, sometimes I seriously doubt the timing and the purpose, but I go with it . . .

My youngest sister is working at H&R Block as a secretary now. This is quite funny, because our mom worked there when my other sister and I were very little. I can remember her bringing us into the office once in a while and me playing with the big adding machines. We joke that since she missed the experience the first time, she subconsciously wanted to work there someday too . . .

Michelle Kwan – was it just me, or did it seem like last night they were talking about her like she was dead or something? I really respect her determination and body of work, but I was very disappointed when she petitioned to be on the Olympic team after having so many injuries the past year – I thought it was very unfair to all those young women who worked so hard in competition and actually won spots on the team. I am glad that Emily Hughes finally gets to go, glad that Sasha Cohen will get her chance to shine.

When you work so hard for so long, it is hard to give up on the dream you have, even when the chances for it happening fade away. If you are good enough for so long, people start to give you a pass on things – “oh, she’s stumbling now, but we know she can step it up in the clutch!” In the short term, it’s great to give people the benefit of the doubt, but after a while, you have to sit down and say, “Maybe this isn’t for you anymore . . .”

It is hard. It is heartbreaking. You want to be young forever, with boundless energy and being able to strive harder, faster, longer. But at some point you have to modify the dream and take the knowledge you’ve gained and pass it along to others, and make a name for yourself in another way. Michelle Kwan is learning this lesson the hard way right now . . . but the real tragedy is that some of us never quite get it . . .

2 comments:

Virginia Gal said...

I have that stupid James Blunt "You're Beautiful" song in my head also!
As for Michelle, I think they did the right thing by letting her on the team, she is still the better skater. Plus she has had years and years of good skating, that should weight more than some chippy 16-year old's one time performance at Nationals. I appreciated her perserverance in trying for that gold - if you don't have dreams what is the point of living?

Molly Malone said...

re: "Beautiful". shh. shh. don't fight it. you know you want it. you know it's a good thing.