Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Grandmama Drama

When it rains, it pours. There is a bit of family drama going on at the moment concerning my Grandma and lack of family involvement in her upkeep. I’m not quite sure I should blog, even vaguely, about a lot of the particulars, but let’s just say that I am in a very awkward position all around. It has a lot to do with the general dysfunction and lack of communication between all of the family members involved and I am square in the middle – trying to do the best that I can without placing blame, but finding it very difficult to do so. I am tired, sad and angry about the whole thing, and it causes even more stress because I HATE confrontation and some will be needed here.

All I can say is, if this is how people treat their mother, how will they expect to be treated when they get to be her age, huh? I mean, I am just one of a large number of children and grandchildren – how am I the only one who is keeping in regular contact here, and worried about her well-being?

See, this is where I try not to place blame. There are many sides to the story and I am only hearing a few. All I know is that there is a very guarded, but unhappy 89 year old woman who needs more looking after than she is getting now, as much as she doesn’t like to admit it. I wish I could do more for her, but I can’t right now – Mr. Random and I just don’t have the resources. I know she really appreciates all that we do try to do, such as our visits every two weeks for Sunday dinner, and bringing her little fun things that she loves, but I wish . . . I could do better than that.

My friend, J, always tells me that it is the ones who try to do the most who often feel the most guilty, and J is very right there . . .

Just please send happy vibes as I try to navigate my way through the minefield that this Thanksgiving holiday is becoming. I send happy vibes back out to all of you too!


mommanator said...

First of all your Random shots are great!
Do what you can at the time- she will remember who does what and God will do the rest!

CS said...

Happy vibes to you!

This is a tough situation, and I've heard from people on every possible viewpoint on this in my work. Familes - so very complicated.

Virginia Gal said...

oh goodness, I am sorry to hear about the drama - your intentions are good. I agree with your friend J about feeling guilty.

I hope everything works out, sending you happy vibes.