I’m only asking because it keeps coming up in conversations that I’ve been having with Mr. Random lately.
He says that his life doesn’t feel “settled” or stable right now – all of our friends are having kids now and are well on their career paths, while he doesn’t like his current job and is going back to school. I counter that he’s had the same job for 12 years, has been married for almost 8 years, and 2 years ago bought property . . . how much more settled does he want to be?
I say that we shouldn’t compare ourselves to other people – we should do what makes us happy and forget what everyone else is doing. “Other people” aren’t the ones who have to live our own lives day-to-day. Mr. Random is really excited about going to grad school, but he still wants to be like everyone else – not for the sake of being like everyone else, he says, but because he feels like that is what needs to be happening now.
I, on the other hand, don’t feel that way. For the first time in 35 years, I’m kind of excited by how life is now. I see so many possibilities out there for us – so many things to do, so many places to go. After I had my miscarriage 5 years ago, I pretty much stopped doing everything that I had been doing and kind of folded in on myself in a way. Luckily I had some friends whose presence forced me to join the land of the living and do stuff, but it wasn’t until the past year or so that I’ve started to feel optimistic again. I’m not in a real hurry to have kids at this point – maybe in the next couple of years, but not right away. And if, because of my advancing age, we aren’t able to have any, I’d be quite happy to adopt.
Mr. Random does agree with me . . . but he still feels . . . I guess, an internal pressure to have certain things checked off the list by now. He doesn’t feel like a “true” adult yet. But I don’t think that having kids makes you a “true” adult . . . having a full-time job and mortgage and other bills to pay seems to fit the bill rather nicely. Also being old enough to appreciate some things that you couldn’t when you were younger – having greater amounts of wisdom to draw from when faced with situations and relationships. Being able to be a mentor to someone and help them along their paths . . . being able to have the freedom to explore new things and also the freedom to be able to hang back . . .
What does being an adult mean to you?
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Singin’ in the Rain
That’s all we’ve been doing the last few days out here in Northern Virginia . . .
One friend of ours has been flooded out of his home and lost his car because the small creek behind his house has now become a river. We were just at his house on Saturday night, having dinner in his newly-landscaped small back yard, admiring the new screened deck that he just put on the back of the house. When the area clears out, and he’s allowed to go back to his house, I am sure there will be a group of us going with him to help clean up and try to lift his spirits . . .
Another person we know, a young man who just started working for my department, has been almost flooded out of his Capitol Hill English basement apartment – this after being stuck at the airport an extra day because his flight was cancelled due to the storms . . .
It’s certainly not Katrina-level devastation going on here, but it is pretty bad. Mr. Random and I are lucky that we live on the top floor of a garden-style condo building, located on high ground. Previously, we rented a townhouse that had a basement entrance, and we remember having to break out the buckets and bail out a few times after the storm drain got clogged and everything backed up into basement – almost ruining everything we had stored down there . . .
This morning seems to be beautiful – sunny with blue skies and fluffy white clouds, but there are supposed to be more rainstorms coming over the next few days.
Should we be building an ark? Or is this some sort of sign? I mean, I’m fairly certain that with all of the water we’re going to have lying around, we’ll definitely have a plague of mosquitoes swarming about this summer . . .
Are any of you being deluged with the rain?
One friend of ours has been flooded out of his home and lost his car because the small creek behind his house has now become a river. We were just at his house on Saturday night, having dinner in his newly-landscaped small back yard, admiring the new screened deck that he just put on the back of the house. When the area clears out, and he’s allowed to go back to his house, I am sure there will be a group of us going with him to help clean up and try to lift his spirits . . .
Another person we know, a young man who just started working for my department, has been almost flooded out of his Capitol Hill English basement apartment – this after being stuck at the airport an extra day because his flight was cancelled due to the storms . . .
It’s certainly not Katrina-level devastation going on here, but it is pretty bad. Mr. Random and I are lucky that we live on the top floor of a garden-style condo building, located on high ground. Previously, we rented a townhouse that had a basement entrance, and we remember having to break out the buckets and bail out a few times after the storm drain got clogged and everything backed up into basement – almost ruining everything we had stored down there . . .
This morning seems to be beautiful – sunny with blue skies and fluffy white clouds, but there are supposed to be more rainstorms coming over the next few days.
Should we be building an ark? Or is this some sort of sign? I mean, I’m fairly certain that with all of the water we’re going to have lying around, we’ll definitely have a plague of mosquitoes swarming about this summer . . .
Are any of you being deluged with the rain?
Monday, June 26, 2006
Trying to Cut Through the Fog
The thing about not writing on your blog for several days is that when you do have time to write, you can’t because you want your next post to be so weighty and well-thought out that you get too freaked out to write.
That’s where I am right now . . .
My mind has been a muddled mess the past few days. Things at work have not let up much since after the conference and there are all of these weighty problems to solve. I am tired. I am taking off the last week of July and the first week of August, but we aren’t going anywhere, which bums me out to no end. There is plenty to do and explore here in the DC area, and I never tire of that, but I would like to go somewhere else and just chill-out for a while . . .
Now that Mr. Random is going to grad school, money is going to be a bit tighter than it already was, which will put a crimp in many travel pans I had. We’re very, very excited mind you – this is an awesome opportunity for him – he is one of 17 chosen for a program that gets hundreds of applicants. It will just be a little more hectic than usual and we’ll be taking on a bit more debt, but it will make Mr. Random much happier in the long run, and that’s what counts.
Everything is just so overwhelming . . . please send some happy vibes for me to calm down a bit . . .
That’s where I am right now . . .
My mind has been a muddled mess the past few days. Things at work have not let up much since after the conference and there are all of these weighty problems to solve. I am tired. I am taking off the last week of July and the first week of August, but we aren’t going anywhere, which bums me out to no end. There is plenty to do and explore here in the DC area, and I never tire of that, but I would like to go somewhere else and just chill-out for a while . . .
Now that Mr. Random is going to grad school, money is going to be a bit tighter than it already was, which will put a crimp in many travel pans I had. We’re very, very excited mind you – this is an awesome opportunity for him – he is one of 17 chosen for a program that gets hundreds of applicants. It will just be a little more hectic than usual and we’ll be taking on a bit more debt, but it will make Mr. Random much happier in the long run, and that’s what counts.
Everything is just so overwhelming . . . please send some happy vibes for me to calm down a bit . . .
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Been Having Technical Difficulties
Sorry for the lack of posts . . . my laptop has been having problems with our wireless router, which means that at the moment that I am most likely to have time to sit down a write a coherent post, I've been unable to . . .
Much has been going on to catch you up on:
Mr. Random has gotten into grad school and will start in the fall.
I might be getting some sort of award tomorrow for my volunteer ESL teaching
I've lost 5 pounds since my last doctor's appointment in January.
My sister got into a Forensics program and will be learning to do CSI type stuff.
. . . Don't have time to elaborate, though. Hope to be able to later. Just wanted to let you know I've been thinking about you all and wondering if you're doing well!
Much has been going on to catch you up on:
Mr. Random has gotten into grad school and will start in the fall.
I might be getting some sort of award tomorrow for my volunteer ESL teaching
I've lost 5 pounds since my last doctor's appointment in January.
My sister got into a Forensics program and will be learning to do CSI type stuff.
. . . Don't have time to elaborate, though. Hope to be able to later. Just wanted to let you know I've been thinking about you all and wondering if you're doing well!
Thursday, June 15, 2006
The Life of the Party
Clicking around the blogosphere, trying to catch up on my blog reading from last week, I came upon this interesting discussion at Marginal Revolution:
(http://www.marginalrevolution.com/marginalrevolution/2006/06/when_should_you.html)
So my question of the day is: When you go to a party, are you the type of person who is there on-time, or the type of person who shows up much later?
I tend to show up almost to the minute – at most 5 or 10 minutes after the stated start time. I rather enjoy helping to set things up and hanging out with the host in a more relaxed atmosphere, getting to catch up a bit before the deluge of other guests comes. That way, I will already have had a substantial visit with the hosts and am then free to meet and greet all the other folks as they come. I also think it is more respectful of the hosts to show up more or less on time – otherwise, the hosts are just there twiddling their thumbs, wondering where everyone is . . . I know that feeling all too well . . .
When I throw a party, I try to have everything ready right on time, but inevitably everyone shows up an hour late. I’m not kidding – one time Mr. Random and I had a New Year’s Day party at our home, and everyone was supposed to show up at 5 . . . people didn’t start rolling in until 6 or so. During that hour, I was just mortified – didn’t we say 5 o’clock? Do people not like us? Mr. Random and I were at the window almost every other minute, frantic, wondering where everyone was . . . finally, one couple showed up, and as they walked in they were surprised that no one else was there . . . the rest of the folks arrived shortly thereafter . . . to this day, I don’t know why EVERYONE was late . . . I guess everyone was on “Democrat” time or something . . .
I am also a big believer in RSVP’ing . . . one time, we invited a whole bunch of our friends to come over for a party on a Saturday, and sent out the e-mailed invites about a month in advance, and by the Friday before the party I had only heard from 5 people that they were coming. So, of course, Mr. Random and I prepared for that many people. I was way too busy all day Saturday to check my e-mail again – I mean, why would I need to? Well, that night we were in for quite a surprise when 14 people showed up . . . the newcomers said that they did RSVP, and when I checked on Monday . . . yup, they did! . . . but, goodness, give me at least a day’s notice, pretty please?
I don’t know if this is just a D.C. thing, where no one wants to commit to anything in case something better comes along, but I think it’s rather rude not to let people know ahead of time if you’re coming . . . especially those of us on a budget who have to plan ahead very carefully what menu to have and how much food to buy . . .
So, question number two, are you an “RSVP’er” or a “show-up-if-I-feel-like-it”-er?
(http://www.marginalrevolution.com/marginalrevolution/2006/06/when_should_you.html)
So my question of the day is: When you go to a party, are you the type of person who is there on-time, or the type of person who shows up much later?
I tend to show up almost to the minute – at most 5 or 10 minutes after the stated start time. I rather enjoy helping to set things up and hanging out with the host in a more relaxed atmosphere, getting to catch up a bit before the deluge of other guests comes. That way, I will already have had a substantial visit with the hosts and am then free to meet and greet all the other folks as they come. I also think it is more respectful of the hosts to show up more or less on time – otherwise, the hosts are just there twiddling their thumbs, wondering where everyone is . . . I know that feeling all too well . . .
When I throw a party, I try to have everything ready right on time, but inevitably everyone shows up an hour late. I’m not kidding – one time Mr. Random and I had a New Year’s Day party at our home, and everyone was supposed to show up at 5 . . . people didn’t start rolling in until 6 or so. During that hour, I was just mortified – didn’t we say 5 o’clock? Do people not like us? Mr. Random and I were at the window almost every other minute, frantic, wondering where everyone was . . . finally, one couple showed up, and as they walked in they were surprised that no one else was there . . . the rest of the folks arrived shortly thereafter . . . to this day, I don’t know why EVERYONE was late . . . I guess everyone was on “Democrat” time or something . . .
I am also a big believer in RSVP’ing . . . one time, we invited a whole bunch of our friends to come over for a party on a Saturday, and sent out the e-mailed invites about a month in advance, and by the Friday before the party I had only heard from 5 people that they were coming. So, of course, Mr. Random and I prepared for that many people. I was way too busy all day Saturday to check my e-mail again – I mean, why would I need to? Well, that night we were in for quite a surprise when 14 people showed up . . . the newcomers said that they did RSVP, and when I checked on Monday . . . yup, they did! . . . but, goodness, give me at least a day’s notice, pretty please?
I don’t know if this is just a D.C. thing, where no one wants to commit to anything in case something better comes along, but I think it’s rather rude not to let people know ahead of time if you’re coming . . . especially those of us on a budget who have to plan ahead very carefully what menu to have and how much food to buy . . .
So, question number two, are you an “RSVP’er” or a “show-up-if-I-feel-like-it”-er?
Monday, June 12, 2006
My Poor Excuse for a Summary
It’s going to be a little difficult describing how my week has gone without blowing the thin veneer of anonymity that exists here, but I’m certainly going to try . . .
The conference seems to have been a rousing success in the eyes of our attendees. There seemed to be great excitement within the field about the renewed attention that we are putting towards them, and about the increased possibilities for networking and technical assistance. All of the plenaries and workshops seemed to be spot on, and the awards ceremonies, dinners, and other fun events were very well received.
This is bad. Very bad.
Huh? What? . . . Well, let me explain . . .
The person who was in charge of putting together the conference this year was someone who antagonized the entire staff with pointless meetings, outrageous and ever-changing demands, more pointless meetings, and still left a lot of details to the very last minute, stressing out an already stressed out staff ten times more than was necessary. To have the conference be such a success means that his methods and madness will be considered to be entirely justified. Our meeting planning staff has vowed not to go through such an ordeal again, and we may lose more than a few hard-working staff members because of it. Now it wasn’t just this one person – there have been some new hires lately who have been most jerky to their staffs and this conference preparation just made an already bad situation worse. It has been dismaying to see so many of my friends go through such a horrible experience, and I don’t think they will take much more mistreatment . . .
That being said, I cannot personally complain too much. Well, I can, but for different reasons. My role in this conference was expanded from my usual role in past years, requiring so much more preparation and face time with attendees. Our first day, pre-conference meeting was well attended and highly thought of, even though my boss did not follow the agenda as she should have, which made the proceedings a bit hard to follow and feel a bit “clique-y” for those who were new to the field. (I know this because I tabulate the evaluation forms.) My boss is not big on lots of “planning” and tends to let things sort of be a lot more free form than I would like. Some people like that type of lack of structure, but most people don’t – if the agenda says something, people tend to want to learn exactly what is advertised . . .
The whole conference was so draining, especially since I had to be “on” for four days straight, from 7 AM through 9 PM each day. I am NOT really a people person . . . now while I enjoy helping people out, and answering questions, and getting to see people from the field that I usually only talk to by phone or e-mail, I can only stand to deal with people in person for so long. I am lousy at small talk. By Saturday afternoon, I was just about to lose it . . . I had to go sit in an empty workshop room for a half-hour, just to try to calm myself down and center myself a bit . . .
The last night’s dinner was both an awards dinner and a big send off for the past chair of our board of directors. It is an evening when we recognize some of the youth leaders in the field and get to hear about some of the amazing things that these 13-25 year olds are doing in their communities. I have always found it to be the most inspiring part of our conference. One high school kid wrote and starred in a 15 minute documentary that is now being adopted in all of the local schools in the area as a teaching aid. Another young woman started a program at her high school to help other kids be heard and be more accepting of differences. You can’t help but wonder if you could have done anything so amazing when you were in high school – I know that I was pretty clueless at that age . . .
This is all I can write for now. It isn’t as comprehensive as I had hoped, but I keep getting distracted with other stuff (such as the US’s lousy 0-3 loss to the Czech Republic today at the World Cup – well, I’m guessing they aren’t going to make it out of the first round if they keep playing so suckily . . . and their next opponents are Italy and Ghana, so unless a miracle happens, I wouldn’t place any bets on the US . . .)
It’s back to my normal randomness tomorrow!
The conference seems to have been a rousing success in the eyes of our attendees. There seemed to be great excitement within the field about the renewed attention that we are putting towards them, and about the increased possibilities for networking and technical assistance. All of the plenaries and workshops seemed to be spot on, and the awards ceremonies, dinners, and other fun events were very well received.
This is bad. Very bad.
Huh? What? . . . Well, let me explain . . .
The person who was in charge of putting together the conference this year was someone who antagonized the entire staff with pointless meetings, outrageous and ever-changing demands, more pointless meetings, and still left a lot of details to the very last minute, stressing out an already stressed out staff ten times more than was necessary. To have the conference be such a success means that his methods and madness will be considered to be entirely justified. Our meeting planning staff has vowed not to go through such an ordeal again, and we may lose more than a few hard-working staff members because of it. Now it wasn’t just this one person – there have been some new hires lately who have been most jerky to their staffs and this conference preparation just made an already bad situation worse. It has been dismaying to see so many of my friends go through such a horrible experience, and I don’t think they will take much more mistreatment . . .
That being said, I cannot personally complain too much. Well, I can, but for different reasons. My role in this conference was expanded from my usual role in past years, requiring so much more preparation and face time with attendees. Our first day, pre-conference meeting was well attended and highly thought of, even though my boss did not follow the agenda as she should have, which made the proceedings a bit hard to follow and feel a bit “clique-y” for those who were new to the field. (I know this because I tabulate the evaluation forms.) My boss is not big on lots of “planning” and tends to let things sort of be a lot more free form than I would like. Some people like that type of lack of structure, but most people don’t – if the agenda says something, people tend to want to learn exactly what is advertised . . .
The whole conference was so draining, especially since I had to be “on” for four days straight, from 7 AM through 9 PM each day. I am NOT really a people person . . . now while I enjoy helping people out, and answering questions, and getting to see people from the field that I usually only talk to by phone or e-mail, I can only stand to deal with people in person for so long. I am lousy at small talk. By Saturday afternoon, I was just about to lose it . . . I had to go sit in an empty workshop room for a half-hour, just to try to calm myself down and center myself a bit . . .
The last night’s dinner was both an awards dinner and a big send off for the past chair of our board of directors. It is an evening when we recognize some of the youth leaders in the field and get to hear about some of the amazing things that these 13-25 year olds are doing in their communities. I have always found it to be the most inspiring part of our conference. One high school kid wrote and starred in a 15 minute documentary that is now being adopted in all of the local schools in the area as a teaching aid. Another young woman started a program at her high school to help other kids be heard and be more accepting of differences. You can’t help but wonder if you could have done anything so amazing when you were in high school – I know that I was pretty clueless at that age . . .
This is all I can write for now. It isn’t as comprehensive as I had hoped, but I keep getting distracted with other stuff (such as the US’s lousy 0-3 loss to the Czech Republic today at the World Cup – well, I’m guessing they aren’t going to make it out of the first round if they keep playing so suckily . . . and their next opponents are Italy and Ghana, so unless a miracle happens, I wouldn’t place any bets on the US . . .)
It’s back to my normal randomness tomorrow!
Sunday, June 11, 2006
She's Baaaaack!
Conference is finally over. Woo hoo! Thank goodness . . .
The final dinner ended at 9 PM last night. By the time I got home and put my pajamas on, I was in bed asllep by 10:30. Didn't wake up this morning until 10 AM, and so far all I've done today is watch World Cup soccer on TV and read the newspapers.
I'll try to say more tomorrow, but just wanted everyone to know that I survived and have stories to tell.
I hope everyone had a great week . . . anything interesting happen?
The final dinner ended at 9 PM last night. By the time I got home and put my pajamas on, I was in bed asllep by 10:30. Didn't wake up this morning until 10 AM, and so far all I've done today is watch World Cup soccer on TV and read the newspapers.
I'll try to say more tomorrow, but just wanted everyone to know that I survived and have stories to tell.
I hope everyone had a great week . . . anything interesting happen?
Monday, June 05, 2006
Purple Haze Fills My Brain . . .
This morning I forgot to take my allergy pill, which meant that by lunchtime I was a stuffy, sneezing mess. I keep an over-the-counter allergy pill in my desk for just such an emergency, but the pill always makes my extremely sleepy within a half-hour of taking it. I have to be incredibly desperate to want to take it, and with all of the conference preparations going on, I had to weigh whether or not I’d rather be sleepy or sneezy. I picked “sleepy” and hoped for the best.
Yes, I did stop sneezing, but I also actually almost fell asleep during a conference call this afternoon – one in which I was supposed to take notes for. It was in my boss’s office, which is always a bit muggy to begin with, and I forgot to bring water and some gum with me – my two must haves for keeping me awake. My notes were a smeared, indecipherable scrawl and it was so incredibly difficult to follow what was going on. Not that the topic was all that simple in the first place, but being exhausted didn’t help. Luckily, the call was scheduled for the end of the day, so once my part was over, Mr. Random poured me into the car and home I went, where I promptly fell asleep for two hours. I’m still a bit groggy even now . . . I hope it means I’ll definitely get a good night’s sleep tonight . . .
The weekend was horribly busy – Saturday was spent going to the art supply store to get some materials for an exhibit we are creating for the conference. I didn’t mind terribly since I LOVE art stores and can stare at the pencils and pastels and papers for hours. Afterwards, Mr. Random and I stopped off in Old Town Alexandria to see to see the tall ship, the Godspeed, which came this past week to help commemorate the anniversary of the founding of Jamestown, Virginia. If you’ve never seen an old tall ship before, you wouldn’t expect it to be as small as it is – and then you realize how cramped and scary it must have been to travel across the ocean in such a rickety little thing. It is next heading to Baltimore, Philadelphia, New York and Boston, so if it comes to your neck of the woods and you are into that sort of thing, you should definitely go see it . . .
Last week, we found out that Mr. Random’s mom was laid off from the newspaper she’d worked at for the past 30 years. OK, the official term is that she “was resigned,” since they were trying to not start an uproar amongst the staff and she was planning to retire at the end of this year anyway. In fact, because she was about to retire, the company gave her a much sweeter severance deal than some of the other folks who were laid off. It was still a bit shocking, and Mr. Random’s sister, who also works at the paper, was very freaked out by the news and was quite fearful for her own job, although her own position is safe for now. Mr. Random is worried about his mom, just like I’m worried about my dad, since she has defined herself by her job all her life – especially working for a newspaper, where you are on call 24/7 – and we can’t see her just sitting around and hanging out at the house. She is probably going to get some consulting work from the paper, but for now she is still getting used to the idea of being really retired . . .
As you may know, a lot of other newspapers are laying off or buying out a lot of their staffs. The Washington Post has just let go a bunch of their older employees, many of whose column I always read during the week. I am quite dismayed by the mindset of those who own newspapers these days . . . in the rush to try to get everything online and put all their resources there, they seem to be ignoring the very reason that many of us still read the paper – the content. By letting go so many of their trusted writers, people who have devoted followings of readers and have many years of solid reporting experience, I feel that it diminishes the final product. While I do appreciate that many younger reporters will now get a chance to prove their mettle, it always seems a waste to let people go before their time. Will there be any more like Shirley Povich who made newspapers their life? I may seem overly upset about these things, but I am a great believer in the printed word – while I enjoy reading many blogs and websites, reveling in the opinions of many cool people out there who choose to put their thoughts out into the ether, I have an amazing respect for those who make writing and reporting their career, despite the lousy pay and the lousy hours. (Most reporters don’t make very much.) I guess because I know so many people in the business, I am quite sympathetic . . .
My, I’ve nattered on enough tonight! There’s more going on, but my sleepy brain is going off into odd directions. I hope everyone had a great weekend. Wish me luck this week – come Saturday night, it will all be over and I can finally get some much need rest . . . at least, until the next week, when we start getting ready for another conference in September . . .
Yes, I did stop sneezing, but I also actually almost fell asleep during a conference call this afternoon – one in which I was supposed to take notes for. It was in my boss’s office, which is always a bit muggy to begin with, and I forgot to bring water and some gum with me – my two must haves for keeping me awake. My notes were a smeared, indecipherable scrawl and it was so incredibly difficult to follow what was going on. Not that the topic was all that simple in the first place, but being exhausted didn’t help. Luckily, the call was scheduled for the end of the day, so once my part was over, Mr. Random poured me into the car and home I went, where I promptly fell asleep for two hours. I’m still a bit groggy even now . . . I hope it means I’ll definitely get a good night’s sleep tonight . . .
The weekend was horribly busy – Saturday was spent going to the art supply store to get some materials for an exhibit we are creating for the conference. I didn’t mind terribly since I LOVE art stores and can stare at the pencils and pastels and papers for hours. Afterwards, Mr. Random and I stopped off in Old Town Alexandria to see to see the tall ship, the Godspeed, which came this past week to help commemorate the anniversary of the founding of Jamestown, Virginia. If you’ve never seen an old tall ship before, you wouldn’t expect it to be as small as it is – and then you realize how cramped and scary it must have been to travel across the ocean in such a rickety little thing. It is next heading to Baltimore, Philadelphia, New York and Boston, so if it comes to your neck of the woods and you are into that sort of thing, you should definitely go see it . . .
Last week, we found out that Mr. Random’s mom was laid off from the newspaper she’d worked at for the past 30 years. OK, the official term is that she “was resigned,” since they were trying to not start an uproar amongst the staff and she was planning to retire at the end of this year anyway. In fact, because she was about to retire, the company gave her a much sweeter severance deal than some of the other folks who were laid off. It was still a bit shocking, and Mr. Random’s sister, who also works at the paper, was very freaked out by the news and was quite fearful for her own job, although her own position is safe for now. Mr. Random is worried about his mom, just like I’m worried about my dad, since she has defined herself by her job all her life – especially working for a newspaper, where you are on call 24/7 – and we can’t see her just sitting around and hanging out at the house. She is probably going to get some consulting work from the paper, but for now she is still getting used to the idea of being really retired . . .
As you may know, a lot of other newspapers are laying off or buying out a lot of their staffs. The Washington Post has just let go a bunch of their older employees, many of whose column I always read during the week. I am quite dismayed by the mindset of those who own newspapers these days . . . in the rush to try to get everything online and put all their resources there, they seem to be ignoring the very reason that many of us still read the paper – the content. By letting go so many of their trusted writers, people who have devoted followings of readers and have many years of solid reporting experience, I feel that it diminishes the final product. While I do appreciate that many younger reporters will now get a chance to prove their mettle, it always seems a waste to let people go before their time. Will there be any more like Shirley Povich who made newspapers their life? I may seem overly upset about these things, but I am a great believer in the printed word – while I enjoy reading many blogs and websites, reveling in the opinions of many cool people out there who choose to put their thoughts out into the ether, I have an amazing respect for those who make writing and reporting their career, despite the lousy pay and the lousy hours. (Most reporters don’t make very much.) I guess because I know so many people in the business, I am quite sympathetic . . .
My, I’ve nattered on enough tonight! There’s more going on, but my sleepy brain is going off into odd directions. I hope everyone had a great weekend. Wish me luck this week – come Saturday night, it will all be over and I can finally get some much need rest . . . at least, until the next week, when we start getting ready for another conference in September . . .
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
I Hear You . . .
Many thanks to everyone who commented on my last post, with a special shout out to Eric from Theme Park Experience – Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your advice . . .
I’m still in the thick of things, so forgive me if I’m not updating that much this week. This past holiday weekend brought its own set of challenges to be dealt with, and the amount of angst I’m dealing with on all of these different fronts has been quite tiring . . .
Had a wonderful day yesterday, though – a lovely lunch with friends, a jaunt to the National Gallery to see a couple of the drawing exhibits, a toddle to Old Town for ice cream and a wander through Olssen’s bookstore. Once I got home, I was so exhausted that I fell right to sleep at 8 PM . . . or rather nodded off on the couch and had to be roused at 11 to actually go to bed . . .
I have more to update about, but will have to wait until I’m not as tired . . .
How was everyone’s Holiday? Anyone catch a movie or do anything cool?
I’m still in the thick of things, so forgive me if I’m not updating that much this week. This past holiday weekend brought its own set of challenges to be dealt with, and the amount of angst I’m dealing with on all of these different fronts has been quite tiring . . .
Had a wonderful day yesterday, though – a lovely lunch with friends, a jaunt to the National Gallery to see a couple of the drawing exhibits, a toddle to Old Town for ice cream and a wander through Olssen’s bookstore. Once I got home, I was so exhausted that I fell right to sleep at 8 PM . . . or rather nodded off on the couch and had to be roused at 11 to actually go to bed . . .
I have more to update about, but will have to wait until I’m not as tired . . .
How was everyone’s Holiday? Anyone catch a movie or do anything cool?
Thursday, May 25, 2006
Dancing Through a Minefield
I am not a person who seeks the limelight . . . except when I am.
I never want to be the center of attention . . . except when I do.
I want to be the maestro orchestrating everything behind the scenes, laboring in obscurity, the woman behind the curtain – the one far enough away to not have to take the actual slugs from the crowd, but still have enough power and control to get things done they way they should. I want to be recognized for all my hard work . . . but not too much.
What IS that? WHY is that? Is it another from of passive aggressiveness? A martyr complex of some sort? “Oh, watch her toil back there in obscurity, oh isn’t she wonderful to work so hard for a pittance?”
Is it because I am ultimately afraid of confrontation? To be out in front means that eventually you have to deal with people who are most unpleasant. I’m into making people happy – I’m a "go along to get along" type gal. You have to take a stand and defend it to people who may not be all that great to responding to reason. That’s why I would never run for office, you have to suffer too many fools – especially when they are standing there yelling at you for things that are so totally not in your power. When I worked on a local County Board race, people would come up to the candidate arguing about the death penalty and abortion and a bunch of other national topics. Um, hello? County Board? Nothing to do with those topics, nowhere NEAR those topics.
Anyway, my new position at work is a bit more political than any I’ve had in the past. Have to deal with people’s personalities, know the history of how we’ve interacted with them in the past, have to try to mend fences for things that were (or weren’t done) years ago, where a lot of residual anger has built up because of it.
Every day I have to tell myself, “They aren’t mad at ME, they are mad at the organization, they are mad at the situation – I can’t undo the baggage of several years of neglect in one interaction.” But it hurts. It is hard. My boss and I are here now and we are trying to do our best to serve our clients. But our clients aren’t having any of it, “We’ve heard this before and it didn’t happen, we give up.” “No. No! We are going to do it! We ARE doing it! See?”
It is very discouraging and I am getting very discouraged. I know that if I get through the next six months it will be fine, I will have reached the next level of my career, I’ll be able to handle so much more, I’ll have some real SKILLS. But I’m not sure if I can handle it in the short term, it is so overwhelming, so scary, so hurtful to think about . . .
We are having a conference in a few weeks which could turn out to be very ugly because there is so much pent up frustration and anger at our organization’s neglect of certain things – and I totally understand it, I’d be ticked off too if I were them – but we’re the ones who have to deal with it and I am . . . scared. I mean this is a situation where certain strong personalities in our field may actually stand up in the middle of meetings and cause a major ruckus because their agendas aren’t being addressed . . .
I’m getting ulcers just thinking about it. Adding insult to injury, my boss and I are the only ones who are taking this threat of ugliness seriously – no one else sees a problem . . . which is part of the larger problem in itself . . .
So, this is going to be a huge confrontation. And a huge opportunity. Will I meet the challenge? Will I be able to finesse the political minefield and start affecting positive change? Or will I end up in a fetal position in a corner and demote myself back to being just a scribe, researcher and jack-of-all-trades? . . .
Has anyone else been through something like this professionally? How did you get through the doubts and the fear? Any advice?
I never want to be the center of attention . . . except when I do.
I want to be the maestro orchestrating everything behind the scenes, laboring in obscurity, the woman behind the curtain – the one far enough away to not have to take the actual slugs from the crowd, but still have enough power and control to get things done they way they should. I want to be recognized for all my hard work . . . but not too much.
What IS that? WHY is that? Is it another from of passive aggressiveness? A martyr complex of some sort? “Oh, watch her toil back there in obscurity, oh isn’t she wonderful to work so hard for a pittance?”
Is it because I am ultimately afraid of confrontation? To be out in front means that eventually you have to deal with people who are most unpleasant. I’m into making people happy – I’m a "go along to get along" type gal. You have to take a stand and defend it to people who may not be all that great to responding to reason. That’s why I would never run for office, you have to suffer too many fools – especially when they are standing there yelling at you for things that are so totally not in your power. When I worked on a local County Board race, people would come up to the candidate arguing about the death penalty and abortion and a bunch of other national topics. Um, hello? County Board? Nothing to do with those topics, nowhere NEAR those topics.
Anyway, my new position at work is a bit more political than any I’ve had in the past. Have to deal with people’s personalities, know the history of how we’ve interacted with them in the past, have to try to mend fences for things that were (or weren’t done) years ago, where a lot of residual anger has built up because of it.
Every day I have to tell myself, “They aren’t mad at ME, they are mad at the organization, they are mad at the situation – I can’t undo the baggage of several years of neglect in one interaction.” But it hurts. It is hard. My boss and I are here now and we are trying to do our best to serve our clients. But our clients aren’t having any of it, “We’ve heard this before and it didn’t happen, we give up.” “No. No! We are going to do it! We ARE doing it! See?”
It is very discouraging and I am getting very discouraged. I know that if I get through the next six months it will be fine, I will have reached the next level of my career, I’ll be able to handle so much more, I’ll have some real SKILLS. But I’m not sure if I can handle it in the short term, it is so overwhelming, so scary, so hurtful to think about . . .
We are having a conference in a few weeks which could turn out to be very ugly because there is so much pent up frustration and anger at our organization’s neglect of certain things – and I totally understand it, I’d be ticked off too if I were them – but we’re the ones who have to deal with it and I am . . . scared. I mean this is a situation where certain strong personalities in our field may actually stand up in the middle of meetings and cause a major ruckus because their agendas aren’t being addressed . . .
I’m getting ulcers just thinking about it. Adding insult to injury, my boss and I are the only ones who are taking this threat of ugliness seriously – no one else sees a problem . . . which is part of the larger problem in itself . . .
So, this is going to be a huge confrontation. And a huge opportunity. Will I meet the challenge? Will I be able to finesse the political minefield and start affecting positive change? Or will I end up in a fetal position in a corner and demote myself back to being just a scribe, researcher and jack-of-all-trades? . . .
Has anyone else been through something like this professionally? How did you get through the doubts and the fear? Any advice?
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Queens for a Weekend
My trip to New York went . . . eh. My friend, L, was exhausted after her Law School finals and really did not feel like doing very much of anything.
The night before I came, I called and asked to make sure it was OK to come up. I knew she was tired, but she insisted that once I got there she’d be ready to paint the town . . .
So Friday night, after arriving at Penn Station and making our way to Queens by way of the ever lovely NYC Subway system, we just stayed home and ordered in Chinese food. One of her friends called and invited us to go out later that night – and I was totally up for it! Visions of Random Kath stylishly hitting the NYC clubs at 11:30 and having a few mojitos danced in my head! – but she told them she was way too tired. So we watched a lot of “What Not to Wear” and went to bed.
Saturday morning, my eyes flew open at 7 AM, raring to go. I’m so used to having Random Cat meowing in my face at that time that now I just wake up naturally. L was still fast asleep, so I got up and got showered and dressed and waited for L to wake up. I brought a book of Sudoku puzzles with me, so I polished off about 10 of them before getting bored and turning on the TV at 10:30 to watch "Paula's Home Cooking" on the Food Network. L finally got up at 11. We didn’t leave the house until 2, but part of that was getting locked INTO the apartment and having to get the super to let us out. The door was so old that the latch had worn down and wasn’t working properly. Excitement!
We took the long subway ride to SoHo. L made me bring along a bottle of water and a book, since she said the ride would take a while. The subway isn’t as clean as DC’s Metro, but it sure goes more places . . . and there was quite a diverse crowd on there. To get down to the subway is all stairs – no escalators – and I was amazed how many people were able to drag full double-strollers and shopping/laundry carts down all those stairs. The subway also uses something almost exactly like Metrocards and using the machines were pretty cool. Did you know that you pay $2 and can go anywhere in the system for that amount at any time, even if you transfer among trains? That seems like a so much better deal to me than DC, where you have to figure out how much the fare costs depending on where you’re going or if it’s rush hour. There were even stations that had places selling newspapers and snacks on the platform, and I immediately thought of the Seinfeld where Kramer would jump off the train, buy a Gyro really quick and jump back on before the doors closed. I always thought that was pretty cool . . .
Walking down the streets of Queens and riding on the subway brought me back to being 14 years old and living in Philly and riding the subway to school. Reminded me how much I missed being in the city and getting around so independently. Having lots of mom and pop stores and restaurants up and down the streets. The grime, the tell-tale urine-y laced smell, the crappy sidewalks, the diversity of people walking around – older people walking out in front of the synagogue in packs, group of kids on the subway train horsing around like my friends used to, people honking their horns in front of apartment buildings at all hours . . . it felt like . . . being home again. Being little again – the future stretched out before me and knowing that I could hold my own all by myself . . . My eyes grew wide, I had a spring in my step, I felt like “Yes! Let’s go!”
So we got to SoHo, where we were met with a teeming mass of people and tall buildings and stores everywhere. This is the New York I imagined! We walked around for a little bit, but we both were starving at this point – she didn’t have any actual food in the apartment since she was trying to lose weight. We found a cool little restaurant, with a kind of diner bar downstairs and a main dining room surrounded by windows upstairs, whose name escapes me (but the back of the card said “lofts 520”). There I ate the best turkey burger I have ever tasted, honest-to-goodness, the patty being thick and moist and so, so flavorful. The fries were thin and crispy, but not too thin and not too salty. I would go back in a heartbeat . . .
After lunch, we walked around a little bit more and I was dazzled by all of the stores, and even more dazzled by the street vendors. I was able to pick up some interesting souvenirs for my family, the best being a framed set of pictures – one of John Lennon wearing a New York City T-shirt, next to it a picture of near his gravesite (I’m guessing) with “Imagine” written in mosaics. Mr. Random loved it and now has it hanging on his office wall . . .
After only an hour or so, L was getting tired of walking around, although I could have gone for the rest of the day. So we took the subway all the way back to Queens, where we had a message that some friends wanted to catch the 9:30 showing of "The DaVinci Code" somewhere on the Upper East Side. I got really psyched about that, even though I had no desire to see the movie, because – hey! It’s the Upper East Side! I’ve only heard about that place . . .
However, we later got another call that there was a mix up and they could only get tickets for the 10:45 show. L didn’t want to be out late, so she declined. She spent the evening researching bar exam-related stuff, while I sat in the living room and watched Sabado Gigante. I went to bed at 11 for lack of anything else better to do . . .
You see, I was trying to be the good guest, just rolling with the punches and trying not to seem bored or way disappointed. I stayed as upbeat as I could and tried to stay out of her way and let her do what she needed to do . . .
Sunday morning, L slept in again, but at 11 she asked if I still wanted to go to the Algonquin for brunch. Since my train was leaving at 2, and it would take a while to go into Manhattan and then wait to get a table, I declined that idea. So we went to the train station and had lunch at the TGIFriday’s. She apologized for being a lousy host and said she felt real bad about how the weekend turned out. She promised that once she passed the bar she’d bring me back to NY and we’d go all sorts of places then. I told her that I had a good time anyway and not to worry . . . I knew she was a bit exhausted and I was just really glad to see her . . .
On the way home, I tried to put a happy face on the weekend, but I still kind of wish I had stayed home . . . I felt totally in the way there, and there was an arts festival going on here in VA that I was sad that I missed. At least now I can say that I spent a weekend in New York . . .
Sometimes I think that my expectations are much too high for things like this. I mean, all I wanted to do was 3 things: see Times Square at night, go hang out in SoHo for a day, and have brunch at the Algonquin and pretend I was Dorothy Parker for a while. If I wanted to sit around and watch TV, I can stay home . . . in fact, I don’t even do that at home very much – I’m always finding stuff to do and places to go. I do feel for my friend, she had had a rough semester and was really, really exhausted, but when I begging off from coming, she insisted that once I came we’d definitely do stuff. I feel like such a horrible friend, but I also feel bad because the weekend really did suck . . .
I do hope to go back again sometime soon and get to explore a bit more and look at things more closely. Maybe stay in a bed and breakfast closer to the action and try to see one of the infamous Off-Off Broadway shows and catch a comedy night somewhere. Hit the MoMA for a day. Explore the Village. I better start saving my money now . . .
The night before I came, I called and asked to make sure it was OK to come up. I knew she was tired, but she insisted that once I got there she’d be ready to paint the town . . .
So Friday night, after arriving at Penn Station and making our way to Queens by way of the ever lovely NYC Subway system, we just stayed home and ordered in Chinese food. One of her friends called and invited us to go out later that night – and I was totally up for it! Visions of Random Kath stylishly hitting the NYC clubs at 11:30 and having a few mojitos danced in my head! – but she told them she was way too tired. So we watched a lot of “What Not to Wear” and went to bed.
Saturday morning, my eyes flew open at 7 AM, raring to go. I’m so used to having Random Cat meowing in my face at that time that now I just wake up naturally. L was still fast asleep, so I got up and got showered and dressed and waited for L to wake up. I brought a book of Sudoku puzzles with me, so I polished off about 10 of them before getting bored and turning on the TV at 10:30 to watch "Paula's Home Cooking" on the Food Network. L finally got up at 11. We didn’t leave the house until 2, but part of that was getting locked INTO the apartment and having to get the super to let us out. The door was so old that the latch had worn down and wasn’t working properly. Excitement!
We took the long subway ride to SoHo. L made me bring along a bottle of water and a book, since she said the ride would take a while. The subway isn’t as clean as DC’s Metro, but it sure goes more places . . . and there was quite a diverse crowd on there. To get down to the subway is all stairs – no escalators – and I was amazed how many people were able to drag full double-strollers and shopping/laundry carts down all those stairs. The subway also uses something almost exactly like Metrocards and using the machines were pretty cool. Did you know that you pay $2 and can go anywhere in the system for that amount at any time, even if you transfer among trains? That seems like a so much better deal to me than DC, where you have to figure out how much the fare costs depending on where you’re going or if it’s rush hour. There were even stations that had places selling newspapers and snacks on the platform, and I immediately thought of the Seinfeld where Kramer would jump off the train, buy a Gyro really quick and jump back on before the doors closed. I always thought that was pretty cool . . .
Walking down the streets of Queens and riding on the subway brought me back to being 14 years old and living in Philly and riding the subway to school. Reminded me how much I missed being in the city and getting around so independently. Having lots of mom and pop stores and restaurants up and down the streets. The grime, the tell-tale urine-y laced smell, the crappy sidewalks, the diversity of people walking around – older people walking out in front of the synagogue in packs, group of kids on the subway train horsing around like my friends used to, people honking their horns in front of apartment buildings at all hours . . . it felt like . . . being home again. Being little again – the future stretched out before me and knowing that I could hold my own all by myself . . . My eyes grew wide, I had a spring in my step, I felt like “Yes! Let’s go!”
So we got to SoHo, where we were met with a teeming mass of people and tall buildings and stores everywhere. This is the New York I imagined! We walked around for a little bit, but we both were starving at this point – she didn’t have any actual food in the apartment since she was trying to lose weight. We found a cool little restaurant, with a kind of diner bar downstairs and a main dining room surrounded by windows upstairs, whose name escapes me (but the back of the card said “lofts 520”). There I ate the best turkey burger I have ever tasted, honest-to-goodness, the patty being thick and moist and so, so flavorful. The fries were thin and crispy, but not too thin and not too salty. I would go back in a heartbeat . . .
After lunch, we walked around a little bit more and I was dazzled by all of the stores, and even more dazzled by the street vendors. I was able to pick up some interesting souvenirs for my family, the best being a framed set of pictures – one of John Lennon wearing a New York City T-shirt, next to it a picture of near his gravesite (I’m guessing) with “Imagine” written in mosaics. Mr. Random loved it and now has it hanging on his office wall . . .
After only an hour or so, L was getting tired of walking around, although I could have gone for the rest of the day. So we took the subway all the way back to Queens, where we had a message that some friends wanted to catch the 9:30 showing of "The DaVinci Code" somewhere on the Upper East Side. I got really psyched about that, even though I had no desire to see the movie, because – hey! It’s the Upper East Side! I’ve only heard about that place . . .
However, we later got another call that there was a mix up and they could only get tickets for the 10:45 show. L didn’t want to be out late, so she declined. She spent the evening researching bar exam-related stuff, while I sat in the living room and watched Sabado Gigante. I went to bed at 11 for lack of anything else better to do . . .
You see, I was trying to be the good guest, just rolling with the punches and trying not to seem bored or way disappointed. I stayed as upbeat as I could and tried to stay out of her way and let her do what she needed to do . . .
Sunday morning, L slept in again, but at 11 she asked if I still wanted to go to the Algonquin for brunch. Since my train was leaving at 2, and it would take a while to go into Manhattan and then wait to get a table, I declined that idea. So we went to the train station and had lunch at the TGIFriday’s. She apologized for being a lousy host and said she felt real bad about how the weekend turned out. She promised that once she passed the bar she’d bring me back to NY and we’d go all sorts of places then. I told her that I had a good time anyway and not to worry . . . I knew she was a bit exhausted and I was just really glad to see her . . .
On the way home, I tried to put a happy face on the weekend, but I still kind of wish I had stayed home . . . I felt totally in the way there, and there was an arts festival going on here in VA that I was sad that I missed. At least now I can say that I spent a weekend in New York . . .
Sometimes I think that my expectations are much too high for things like this. I mean, all I wanted to do was 3 things: see Times Square at night, go hang out in SoHo for a day, and have brunch at the Algonquin and pretend I was Dorothy Parker for a while. If I wanted to sit around and watch TV, I can stay home . . . in fact, I don’t even do that at home very much – I’m always finding stuff to do and places to go. I do feel for my friend, she had had a rough semester and was really, really exhausted, but when I begging off from coming, she insisted that once I came we’d definitely do stuff. I feel like such a horrible friend, but I also feel bad because the weekend really did suck . . .
I do hope to go back again sometime soon and get to explore a bit more and look at things more closely. Maybe stay in a bed and breakfast closer to the action and try to see one of the infamous Off-Off Broadway shows and catch a comedy night somewhere. Hit the MoMA for a day. Explore the Village. I better start saving my money now . . .
Friday, May 19, 2006
Heading Out
Sorry, everyone! It's just been an exhausting week, but now I'm almost on my way to NYC for the weekend.
I'm hoping to get to the Algonquin Hotel on Sunday, at least, and pretend I'm Dorothy Parker for a while . . .
The friend I'm staying with called me last night after she finished up her last take home exam, and she is totally exhausted, and wanted to know if I might be up for exploring the town a little on my own at some point . . .
So I have no idea how this weekend is going to go. All I know is that I'm getting out of town for a few days, and that is good.
I'll share the highlights of my trip with you all when I return!
I'm hoping to get to the Algonquin Hotel on Sunday, at least, and pretend I'm Dorothy Parker for a while . . .
The friend I'm staying with called me last night after she finished up her last take home exam, and she is totally exhausted, and wanted to know if I might be up for exploring the town a little on my own at some point . . .
So I have no idea how this weekend is going to go. All I know is that I'm getting out of town for a few days, and that is good.
I'll share the highlights of my trip with you all when I return!
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
The Loo in the Basement
I actually started to write a decently thoughtful post last night, but of course, it was the first time that our internet was doing fluky things, so no posting last night . . .
As usual, our weekend was busy. Saturday I went to the movies and saw “Art School Confidential.” I wasn’t very fond of the ending and I thought that the story could have followed a different thread and had a much more satisfying ending. However, any day that ends with eating at iHop is a great day . . .
Sunday, Mr. Random and I went to a bunch of open houses in the Del Ray area of Alexandria. There was one house which always looked really cool on the outside, but the inside was incredibly cramped and poorly laid out. And the basement . . . if you could call it that . . . a flight of steep steps leading to a very low basement – so low that even my very short self had to stoop to walk down there. Besides being way too low, the basement had a toilet sitting in the middle of the room, sitting next to the washer and dryer. Just sitting. Out in the open. Not even a screen in front of it. Not even a sink down there. Just a lonely, grimy toilet sitting in the middle of this dark, low, cluttered basement. There was only one other bathroom in the house, on the second floor, and it was tiny. The owners had redone the small kitchen rather nicely, but if it were me, I would wall off the basement and find a way to bring the washer and dryer upstairs. Of course, it was the most expensive house we saw, listed at that time at $749K . . . yes, you heard me right. For three tiny bedrooms, one and “one-quarter” bath, and a death trap basement, almost 750 thousand dollars . . .
We then walked to what looked like a rather small and unassuming bungalow down the street. A friend of mine said that we should really come out and look, since he thought it would be perfect for us, just from how it looked from the outside. When we walked in, my expectations were really low, but I was so, so surprised! The owner had ripped the house down to the studs and started each room from scratch and added on in the back a family room/master bedroom suite w/huge walk-in closet/screened porch and deck. There were wonderful hardwood floors, and gorgeously updated kitchen, a mudroom, two other nice sized bedrooms and a bath, all the rooms on one floor. It was as much my dream house as it could possibly be. It was full of light and shiny new. AND it was 30K less than the first house! If that house isn’t snapped up in the next week, I don’t know what’s wrong with people.
Now I can’t afford any of these houses, and I don’t believe that Mr. Random and I will ever be able to. After leaving that bungalow, I felt really depressed. I do love looking at open houses though. I love seeing how they are designed, how they are decorated, how people LIVE in them. So daydreaming is going to have to hold me over for quite a few years more.
. . . gee, that writing didn’t end the way I though it would, but I’m much too tired to fix it. I hope everyone’s week is going well. I’ll try to do better later . . .
As usual, our weekend was busy. Saturday I went to the movies and saw “Art School Confidential.” I wasn’t very fond of the ending and I thought that the story could have followed a different thread and had a much more satisfying ending. However, any day that ends with eating at iHop is a great day . . .
Sunday, Mr. Random and I went to a bunch of open houses in the Del Ray area of Alexandria. There was one house which always looked really cool on the outside, but the inside was incredibly cramped and poorly laid out. And the basement . . . if you could call it that . . . a flight of steep steps leading to a very low basement – so low that even my very short self had to stoop to walk down there. Besides being way too low, the basement had a toilet sitting in the middle of the room, sitting next to the washer and dryer. Just sitting. Out in the open. Not even a screen in front of it. Not even a sink down there. Just a lonely, grimy toilet sitting in the middle of this dark, low, cluttered basement. There was only one other bathroom in the house, on the second floor, and it was tiny. The owners had redone the small kitchen rather nicely, but if it were me, I would wall off the basement and find a way to bring the washer and dryer upstairs. Of course, it was the most expensive house we saw, listed at that time at $749K . . . yes, you heard me right. For three tiny bedrooms, one and “one-quarter” bath, and a death trap basement, almost 750 thousand dollars . . .
We then walked to what looked like a rather small and unassuming bungalow down the street. A friend of mine said that we should really come out and look, since he thought it would be perfect for us, just from how it looked from the outside. When we walked in, my expectations were really low, but I was so, so surprised! The owner had ripped the house down to the studs and started each room from scratch and added on in the back a family room/master bedroom suite w/huge walk-in closet/screened porch and deck. There were wonderful hardwood floors, and gorgeously updated kitchen, a mudroom, two other nice sized bedrooms and a bath, all the rooms on one floor. It was as much my dream house as it could possibly be. It was full of light and shiny new. AND it was 30K less than the first house! If that house isn’t snapped up in the next week, I don’t know what’s wrong with people.
Now I can’t afford any of these houses, and I don’t believe that Mr. Random and I will ever be able to. After leaving that bungalow, I felt really depressed. I do love looking at open houses though. I love seeing how they are designed, how they are decorated, how people LIVE in them. So daydreaming is going to have to hold me over for quite a few years more.
. . . gee, that writing didn’t end the way I though it would, but I’m much too tired to fix it. I hope everyone’s week is going well. I’ll try to do better later . . .
Thursday, May 11, 2006
Just Another Day . . .
It’s been a day. Not a bad day or a good day, but a day.
I picked up a pair of glasses with my new prescription this afternoon and it took me a while to get used to actually seeing things correctly. I can’t wait to get my new sunglasses and my second set of frames . . . I picked some really daring styles – well, for me they are kind of daring . . . My workday glasses – the ones I picked up today – are thin, burgundy framed, with small, square/oval lenses which work well with my skin tone. For my second pair – my casual/at home/weekend pair, they are thin, blue framed with small oval lenses . . . these will be a little more “coke bottle” than the other ones, because I didn’t want to spend the money to thin out TWO sets of frames. The sunglasses will be thick, but dainty, tortoise shell with small, dark lenses. It’s been dreary and rainy the past two days, so I am not as antsy for the sunglasses, but I definitely want them by my trip to New York next week . . .
My boss has extended an offer to a really nice guy who is going to do a lot of our admin and database stuff. Yay! I’m hoping that he accepts – it will take so much off of my shoulders, and I can start working on other things . . .
No one came into my office today and said they were resigning . . . I should now consider it noteworthy each day that someone DOESN’T do that . . .
Consider this another Random placeholder post . . .
I picked up a pair of glasses with my new prescription this afternoon and it took me a while to get used to actually seeing things correctly. I can’t wait to get my new sunglasses and my second set of frames . . . I picked some really daring styles – well, for me they are kind of daring . . . My workday glasses – the ones I picked up today – are thin, burgundy framed, with small, square/oval lenses which work well with my skin tone. For my second pair – my casual/at home/weekend pair, they are thin, blue framed with small oval lenses . . . these will be a little more “coke bottle” than the other ones, because I didn’t want to spend the money to thin out TWO sets of frames. The sunglasses will be thick, but dainty, tortoise shell with small, dark lenses. It’s been dreary and rainy the past two days, so I am not as antsy for the sunglasses, but I definitely want them by my trip to New York next week . . .
My boss has extended an offer to a really nice guy who is going to do a lot of our admin and database stuff. Yay! I’m hoping that he accepts – it will take so much off of my shoulders, and I can start working on other things . . .
No one came into my office today and said they were resigning . . . I should now consider it noteworthy each day that someone DOESN’T do that . . .
Consider this another Random placeholder post . . .
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Rearranging the Deck Chairs . . .
Two people are leaving the Random Non-profit this week to go on to other jobs. I took one of them out to lunch today just to give him a proper goodbye – he had been rather fun to work with and I am very sad to see him go . . .
When I came back from lunch, my boss’s boss came into my office and said that she was resigning to start her own consulting firm. I’m way happy for her and I think it will be a great fit – she’s worked her for 9 years and wants some new challenges. It’s also a good time to leave before the new CEO gets on board, especially if you don’t feel like going through yet another transitional period . . .
However, I am now wary of anyone who walks into my office and shuts the door. She was the 4th person in 3 months to come in and tell me they were leaving. I just assume now that if someone comes in and closes the door, the next words out of their mouth will be “I just wanted to let you know before it gets out – I’m leaving to . . .”
Today was a bit of a discouraging day for the above reasons and one more. My new boss and I are committed to improving our organization’s relationship with our grassroots. However, they have been neglected for so long that they are no longer paying attention to what we want to do. They have complained for a number of years that we have not been meeting their needs, and no one seemed to be acting on their requests in a timely manner. Now that we finally have the resources and the drive to do what they want us to do, they don’t want to hear it. I understand how they feel – they have been burned before – but I do wish they would give us a chance to improve things . . . some of them do know me and know that I do follow through on what I say I will do. Now I just have to try to do that for the whole field, and somehow let them know that we DO care and we WILL help them . . . I must not take all of this personally . . .
Thanks on the comments on yesterday’s post. I will try to work on Mr. Random to get him to take some time off . . . we both really need it, and him most of all. I am going to NYC to visit a friend of mine next weekend – maybe having the condo to himself for a few days will allow him some breathing space . . .
Any recommendations on what I should see in NYC? I’m already going to Times Square, and hope to spend a day in SoHo. I will be there from next Friday night to Sunday afternoon – is there anything else I should try to get to in such a short time period?
When I came back from lunch, my boss’s boss came into my office and said that she was resigning to start her own consulting firm. I’m way happy for her and I think it will be a great fit – she’s worked her for 9 years and wants some new challenges. It’s also a good time to leave before the new CEO gets on board, especially if you don’t feel like going through yet another transitional period . . .
However, I am now wary of anyone who walks into my office and shuts the door. She was the 4th person in 3 months to come in and tell me they were leaving. I just assume now that if someone comes in and closes the door, the next words out of their mouth will be “I just wanted to let you know before it gets out – I’m leaving to . . .”
Today was a bit of a discouraging day for the above reasons and one more. My new boss and I are committed to improving our organization’s relationship with our grassroots. However, they have been neglected for so long that they are no longer paying attention to what we want to do. They have complained for a number of years that we have not been meeting their needs, and no one seemed to be acting on their requests in a timely manner. Now that we finally have the resources and the drive to do what they want us to do, they don’t want to hear it. I understand how they feel – they have been burned before – but I do wish they would give us a chance to improve things . . . some of them do know me and know that I do follow through on what I say I will do. Now I just have to try to do that for the whole field, and somehow let them know that we DO care and we WILL help them . . . I must not take all of this personally . . .
Thanks on the comments on yesterday’s post. I will try to work on Mr. Random to get him to take some time off . . . we both really need it, and him most of all. I am going to NYC to visit a friend of mine next weekend – maybe having the condo to himself for a few days will allow him some breathing space . . .
Any recommendations on what I should see in NYC? I’m already going to Times Square, and hope to spend a day in SoHo. I will be there from next Friday night to Sunday afternoon – is there anything else I should try to get to in such a short time period?
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
Fork in the Road
Today I tried to access the blog from work and it just wasn’t happening. I’m thinking it was a sign of some sort – that I really need to lay off the blog surfing until I get home . . .
Since we moved our offices, the office manager is making us all print to the same printer room, which happens to be at the other side of the building from where a number of us sit, a fact which really ticks a whole bunch of us off. I wish the Random Non-profit wouldn’t be so darn cheap! I almost want to run to Staples and but my own printer, just so I don’t have to wait for someone to get finished printing out the phone book to get my 2 page outline that I need for a meeting . . .
The days are so busy now – filled with many more meetings. Plus, my new boss is a major talker – there is no such thing as a one minute conversation with her – so meetings take a bit longer than before. I am still overwhelmed, but it is starting to settle into a routine. Hopefully, we will be able to hire an admin pretty soon and be able to apportion duties accordingly . . .
They still have not found anyone for my old position and many things have just been left hanging. I’m feeling kind of bad about that, but there’s nothing I can do since I have my new duties that keep me very busy. I do hope that they staff up that department again very soon . . .
Mr. Random is having a bit of a crisis . . . the type of crisis a lot of us are going through right now. He is trying to figure out what is in his future, what is he meant to do. He feels really demoralized because a lot of things that he has wanted to do, he doesn’t feel that he is good at, and he doesn’t know what to do now. As a child, he wanted to be an astronaut, but wasn’t very good at math or science . . . physics, same deal . . . design, it doesn’t come naturally to him . . . writing, same thing . . . I try to get him to try new things, network, get himself out there at bit more and expose himself to more things, but he just isn’t that interested. He enjoys his soccer games and his running but doesn’t have many other hobbies. I, on the other hand, try everything and love everything, and my problem is the opposite – which way should I go? I am at a loss on what advice to give to help him, other than being as supportive and encouraging as I can. If he doesn’t get into the school program that he is applying for, I have a feeling he is going to be utterly inconsolable . . .
This is something that I am worried about . . . at the moment I am very excited by many possibilities while Mr. Random isn’t. He is looking at all of our friends, with their houses and kids and decent jobs, and is not feeling like an “adult” in comparison. I, on the other hand, am making peace with where I am and don’t necessarily want what those folks have. I mean it’s nice, and I do want it someday, but right now there’s just so much to do and try and places to go. I have a feeling that at some point I am going to have to compromise what I want and put things on hold for a while to pop out a kid or two, but definitely not right now . . .
Mr. Random and I do talk about what we are thinking and feeling often and are trying to balance out each of our desires with those of the other . . . we don’t want either one of us to end up bitter, but it is hard sometimes . . . What do we want our future to be? I guess after buying this condo, and me not being happy with it but knowing that it was as good as it was going to get, has made me not want to have to make another decision that I know that I’m not going to be happy with . . .
Reading over what I just wrote, it sounds much worse than it is, but it has been upon my mind quite a bit and we are trying to puzzle it out and try to figure out how to make the situation better for the both of us . . .
There never seems to be a perfectly dull moment when nothing is going on, it seems . . .
Since we moved our offices, the office manager is making us all print to the same printer room, which happens to be at the other side of the building from where a number of us sit, a fact which really ticks a whole bunch of us off. I wish the Random Non-profit wouldn’t be so darn cheap! I almost want to run to Staples and but my own printer, just so I don’t have to wait for someone to get finished printing out the phone book to get my 2 page outline that I need for a meeting . . .
The days are so busy now – filled with many more meetings. Plus, my new boss is a major talker – there is no such thing as a one minute conversation with her – so meetings take a bit longer than before. I am still overwhelmed, but it is starting to settle into a routine. Hopefully, we will be able to hire an admin pretty soon and be able to apportion duties accordingly . . .
They still have not found anyone for my old position and many things have just been left hanging. I’m feeling kind of bad about that, but there’s nothing I can do since I have my new duties that keep me very busy. I do hope that they staff up that department again very soon . . .
Mr. Random is having a bit of a crisis . . . the type of crisis a lot of us are going through right now. He is trying to figure out what is in his future, what is he meant to do. He feels really demoralized because a lot of things that he has wanted to do, he doesn’t feel that he is good at, and he doesn’t know what to do now. As a child, he wanted to be an astronaut, but wasn’t very good at math or science . . . physics, same deal . . . design, it doesn’t come naturally to him . . . writing, same thing . . . I try to get him to try new things, network, get himself out there at bit more and expose himself to more things, but he just isn’t that interested. He enjoys his soccer games and his running but doesn’t have many other hobbies. I, on the other hand, try everything and love everything, and my problem is the opposite – which way should I go? I am at a loss on what advice to give to help him, other than being as supportive and encouraging as I can. If he doesn’t get into the school program that he is applying for, I have a feeling he is going to be utterly inconsolable . . .
This is something that I am worried about . . . at the moment I am very excited by many possibilities while Mr. Random isn’t. He is looking at all of our friends, with their houses and kids and decent jobs, and is not feeling like an “adult” in comparison. I, on the other hand, am making peace with where I am and don’t necessarily want what those folks have. I mean it’s nice, and I do want it someday, but right now there’s just so much to do and try and places to go. I have a feeling that at some point I am going to have to compromise what I want and put things on hold for a while to pop out a kid or two, but definitely not right now . . .
Mr. Random and I do talk about what we are thinking and feeling often and are trying to balance out each of our desires with those of the other . . . we don’t want either one of us to end up bitter, but it is hard sometimes . . . What do we want our future to be? I guess after buying this condo, and me not being happy with it but knowing that it was as good as it was going to get, has made me not want to have to make another decision that I know that I’m not going to be happy with . . .
Reading over what I just wrote, it sounds much worse than it is, but it has been upon my mind quite a bit and we are trying to puzzle it out and try to figure out how to make the situation better for the both of us . . .
There never seems to be a perfectly dull moment when nothing is going on, it seems . . .
Sunday, May 07, 2006
Hitting a Wrong Note
The weekend is almost over.
I just got finished looking over Mr. Random’s first draft of his personal statement for applying to Journalism school. It was a rambling mess that needs a lot of work, but there are kernels of good stuff in there. Personal statements are incredibly difficult things to write – so many influences go into what makes you want to do something that by narrowing it down to one or two items sometimes leaves out some important information that an admissions office may find compelling . . .
This weekend went OK . . . I mean, we got our errands done, we bought paint for the bathroom, I had my eyes checked, ordered new glasses, I went to lunch with my friend today . . . but it all seems so . . . off . . .
Today I had to sing a solo in church – it did not go well. I was so nervous – I should not have been nervous, but I was petrified to do it. Everyone kept saying not to worry, no one was going to stone me, but when the moment came – I mean I did it, but I was not happy with it. The reason I sing in the choir is because I love singing and have a great time doing it and people can tell that. Starting the day in sheer terror is never a good thing . . . I’m a supporting character, not a soloist – a background singer. I help make the whole group sound better, but I’m not ready to be out in front. I’m a Pip, not Gladys Knight . . .
However, I really need to get over my fear and try to do more things like this. I told the Music Director that next time maybe a duet would be best . . . I feel more confident if I’m not singing by myself. It may be a good way to ease me into solos . . .
Today would have been a good day for a good old-fashioned “hang-out and just chat” with my friend, but it didn’t seem in the cards today. We did have a lovely lunch, ice cream and bookstore haunt, so I can’t complain too much . . . any time out is a good time . . .
I thought I was going to write a bit more, but will have to wait until tomorrow. I still haven’t been sleeping too well, and now I think it is finally catching up with me. I’m really hoping this week isn’t too stressful . . .
I just got finished looking over Mr. Random’s first draft of his personal statement for applying to Journalism school. It was a rambling mess that needs a lot of work, but there are kernels of good stuff in there. Personal statements are incredibly difficult things to write – so many influences go into what makes you want to do something that by narrowing it down to one or two items sometimes leaves out some important information that an admissions office may find compelling . . .
This weekend went OK . . . I mean, we got our errands done, we bought paint for the bathroom, I had my eyes checked, ordered new glasses, I went to lunch with my friend today . . . but it all seems so . . . off . . .
Today I had to sing a solo in church – it did not go well. I was so nervous – I should not have been nervous, but I was petrified to do it. Everyone kept saying not to worry, no one was going to stone me, but when the moment came – I mean I did it, but I was not happy with it. The reason I sing in the choir is because I love singing and have a great time doing it and people can tell that. Starting the day in sheer terror is never a good thing . . . I’m a supporting character, not a soloist – a background singer. I help make the whole group sound better, but I’m not ready to be out in front. I’m a Pip, not Gladys Knight . . .
However, I really need to get over my fear and try to do more things like this. I told the Music Director that next time maybe a duet would be best . . . I feel more confident if I’m not singing by myself. It may be a good way to ease me into solos . . .
Today would have been a good day for a good old-fashioned “hang-out and just chat” with my friend, but it didn’t seem in the cards today. We did have a lovely lunch, ice cream and bookstore haunt, so I can’t complain too much . . . any time out is a good time . . .
I thought I was going to write a bit more, but will have to wait until tomorrow. I still haven’t been sleeping too well, and now I think it is finally catching up with me. I’m really hoping this week isn’t too stressful . . .
Friday, May 05, 2006
Random Happenings
Many things to catch you all up on today!
First of all, I’m at home today. I’ve had a massive headache for the past two days which I considered a sign that I needed a day off. Right now I’m watching Ellen, a show which I LOVE, but never actually get to see except on holidays. She’s doing a “Cinco de Mayo” show and showing scenes from Olvera Street, the oldest street in Los Angeles. I think Mr. Random and I ate at the Mexican restaurant she filmed from, and now I’m all excited at the recognition – I’m just cheesy that way. “Hey, WE ATE THERE! THAT’S SO COOL! I KNOW WHERE THAT IS!” It takes such little things to make me happy . . .
I remember that on that trip I bought a little black backpack purse off of one of the street carts for $10 and it was one of the best purses that I ever had. Not too big, but big enough to hold my essentials easily. Small enough that I could tote it around and not have my arm go numb. I told Mr. Random at the time that if it lasted more than a month, I would be happy – it lasted about a year. I have now devoted my life to finding another purse like that . . . I guess if we go back to the West Coast this summer, we have to go back to Olvera Street and I have to buy 5 of those exact purses from that cart . . .
Second of all, the office move is over. Mr. Random and I came in on Sunday afternoon and unpacked our offices to start getting ready for Monday. The new building, though smaller, is actually a lot nicer and we have office windows that ACTUALLY OPEN. Some of you must know how exciting that is, to actually have the ability to let fresh air into the room. I have a lot of trouble with recirculating air buildings – I get sick all of the time in those - so this is a happy relief. Since the offices are a lot smaller, I had to lose a bookcase, a guest chair and a filing cabinet, but otherwise I have my office set up exactly like I had it before – all of my Arts Festival posters up on the wall, along with my colorful Matisse and my Margaret Bourke-White picture. I have a big picture window with two smaller windows at the bottom that can be opened to get fresh air. There is a huge radiator/air conditioner unit right under the window which can be used to heat or cool the room to my desires, but also takes up a honking amount of room behind my desk, and I can’t put any anything on it, like plants or books, because it’s basically a heater. I used to have a small file hutch in my old office behind my desk there that I used to keep my plants on, but they all had to be relocated and I can’t get used to not having those files right behind me anymore. And now my office is right off the reception area, which means (a) a lot more noise and (b) I have to keep my office incredibly neat all of the time. Otherwise, my office is set up exactly the same as my old office – comfortable and colorful. Mr. Random’s office is across the building from me, which is great! – but he still wanders over to my office about 8 times a day to just say hi or to chat . . .
Third of all, now we have a wireless router, so I am now writing this from the comfort of my bedroom. This is so awesome, we should have done this sooner! . . .
Now for the most exciting thing . . .
Last night, one of my husband’s cousins from random South American country was in town and had dinner with us. He is the youngest son of my husband’s father’s younger brother, and I had never met anyone from that part of the family before. Mr. Random hadn’t seen M since M was 4 years old, and now he is a tall, dark-haired, very handsome 22 year old who is going to college in Canada and was in town to visit a friend from school before joining his family on a vacation in Russia. (They are the very well off part of the family . . .) We were both very nervous before meeting him that we would run out of things to say, but it was quite a lovely dinner and he is quite a sweet, earnest young man, speaking with a very heavy Spanish accent. We showed M our wedding pictures since he was unable to come, and he was glad to see the family that he has not yet met. He talked a lot about his two older brothers, his mom and dad, and how different it was going to college in Canada after growing up in random South American country. He is going to do a semester abroad next year, spending the spring studying in Paris (lucky dog!) . . .
I wish that my youngest sister could have come up and joined us – they are both about the same age and I think they could have gotten along wonderfully. After seeing her picture, he actually asked about her and seemed a bit interested. She could certainly do a lot worse! . . .
I am so glad that meeting him worked out so well. When Mr. Random and I got married, we were both a bit miffed that none of that part of the family came up for the wedding – the wedding of their only Random cousin, the son of the dead brother. They sent a card, but I was furious with his Random uncle . . . especially since they have traveled to the states a few times since then and never once wanted to see us. I know I have to get over it, but I think it is sad that Mr. Random has an uncle who he does not really know and does not seem to want to know him. Luckily his Uncle T has been more than awesome and like a second father to him, but still . . .
. . . Anyway, I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend. We will spend ours trying to fix things up before Mr. Random’s mom comes to visit us in June. I will try to get a little more rest in, if I can . . .
First of all, I’m at home today. I’ve had a massive headache for the past two days which I considered a sign that I needed a day off. Right now I’m watching Ellen, a show which I LOVE, but never actually get to see except on holidays. She’s doing a “Cinco de Mayo” show and showing scenes from Olvera Street, the oldest street in Los Angeles. I think Mr. Random and I ate at the Mexican restaurant she filmed from, and now I’m all excited at the recognition – I’m just cheesy that way. “Hey, WE ATE THERE! THAT’S SO COOL! I KNOW WHERE THAT IS!” It takes such little things to make me happy . . .
I remember that on that trip I bought a little black backpack purse off of one of the street carts for $10 and it was one of the best purses that I ever had. Not too big, but big enough to hold my essentials easily. Small enough that I could tote it around and not have my arm go numb. I told Mr. Random at the time that if it lasted more than a month, I would be happy – it lasted about a year. I have now devoted my life to finding another purse like that . . . I guess if we go back to the West Coast this summer, we have to go back to Olvera Street and I have to buy 5 of those exact purses from that cart . . .
Second of all, the office move is over. Mr. Random and I came in on Sunday afternoon and unpacked our offices to start getting ready for Monday. The new building, though smaller, is actually a lot nicer and we have office windows that ACTUALLY OPEN. Some of you must know how exciting that is, to actually have the ability to let fresh air into the room. I have a lot of trouble with recirculating air buildings – I get sick all of the time in those - so this is a happy relief. Since the offices are a lot smaller, I had to lose a bookcase, a guest chair and a filing cabinet, but otherwise I have my office set up exactly like I had it before – all of my Arts Festival posters up on the wall, along with my colorful Matisse and my Margaret Bourke-White picture. I have a big picture window with two smaller windows at the bottom that can be opened to get fresh air. There is a huge radiator/air conditioner unit right under the window which can be used to heat or cool the room to my desires, but also takes up a honking amount of room behind my desk, and I can’t put any anything on it, like plants or books, because it’s basically a heater. I used to have a small file hutch in my old office behind my desk there that I used to keep my plants on, but they all had to be relocated and I can’t get used to not having those files right behind me anymore. And now my office is right off the reception area, which means (a) a lot more noise and (b) I have to keep my office incredibly neat all of the time. Otherwise, my office is set up exactly the same as my old office – comfortable and colorful. Mr. Random’s office is across the building from me, which is great! – but he still wanders over to my office about 8 times a day to just say hi or to chat . . .
Third of all, now we have a wireless router, so I am now writing this from the comfort of my bedroom. This is so awesome, we should have done this sooner! . . .
Now for the most exciting thing . . .
Last night, one of my husband’s cousins from random South American country was in town and had dinner with us. He is the youngest son of my husband’s father’s younger brother, and I had never met anyone from that part of the family before. Mr. Random hadn’t seen M since M was 4 years old, and now he is a tall, dark-haired, very handsome 22 year old who is going to college in Canada and was in town to visit a friend from school before joining his family on a vacation in Russia. (They are the very well off part of the family . . .) We were both very nervous before meeting him that we would run out of things to say, but it was quite a lovely dinner and he is quite a sweet, earnest young man, speaking with a very heavy Spanish accent. We showed M our wedding pictures since he was unable to come, and he was glad to see the family that he has not yet met. He talked a lot about his two older brothers, his mom and dad, and how different it was going to college in Canada after growing up in random South American country. He is going to do a semester abroad next year, spending the spring studying in Paris (lucky dog!) . . .
I wish that my youngest sister could have come up and joined us – they are both about the same age and I think they could have gotten along wonderfully. After seeing her picture, he actually asked about her and seemed a bit interested. She could certainly do a lot worse! . . .
I am so glad that meeting him worked out so well. When Mr. Random and I got married, we were both a bit miffed that none of that part of the family came up for the wedding – the wedding of their only Random cousin, the son of the dead brother. They sent a card, but I was furious with his Random uncle . . . especially since they have traveled to the states a few times since then and never once wanted to see us. I know I have to get over it, but I think it is sad that Mr. Random has an uncle who he does not really know and does not seem to want to know him. Luckily his Uncle T has been more than awesome and like a second father to him, but still . . .
. . . Anyway, I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend. We will spend ours trying to fix things up before Mr. Random’s mom comes to visit us in June. I will try to get a little more rest in, if I can . . .
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Placeholder
I have not forgotten about you all . . . It’s just been super busy these days and I have not much time to write. I’m glad to see that Virginia Gal is back, wanted to say “Hi” to Merci and Justrose, and give a shout out to Tree of Knowledge who wandered over from Cheese and Responsibility (which needs to go on the blogroll as soon as I have time.)
The weather has been just lovely. My evening schedule was supposed to ease up this week, but it didn’t and I don’t know when it will. However, I should have something pretty interesting to write about after this dinner I’m going to tonight . . .
The weather has been just lovely. My evening schedule was supposed to ease up this week, but it didn’t and I don’t know when it will. However, I should have something pretty interesting to write about after this dinner I’m going to tonight . . .
Friday, April 28, 2006
Today's Random Summary
. . . I am so excited – two of my level 2 ESL students have graduated from our program! This means that they received high enough scores on the assessment exam that they did not have to take level 3 and can now go on to community college level ESL classes. Woo Hoo!
This is a first for me, but it seems like it should happen much more often. When people first take the placement test, anything could happen – they could be having a bad day, be very distracted or the evaluator could interpret their answers differently and as a result someone could end up with a lower placement score than reflects their true proficiency level. Also, the test does not test reading and writing skills very well, so you could place out of the program with excellent oral skills, but still not be able to read or write English very well at all. (As is the case with one of the folks who just placed out.) The organization is supposed to be looking at implementing a new assessment tool, but I have no idea when that will be. It is also hard to get a lot of reading and writing instruction in when you are only dealing with people 2 hours a night, twice a week, with volunteer instructors. The students are always asking for more conversation, pronunciation and vocabulary skills to help them interact better with native speakers and allow them to get better jobs.
The student who placed out of the program with poor reading and writing skills has been matched with a one-on-one tutor, who will work with him exclusively on his reading and writing – so I am very happy that he will continue to get the help he needs . . .
. . . I am a lousy commenter on other people’s blogs. Usually when I read other blogs, I only have time to sneak a peak. Other times, I don’t feel confident enough to comment. There is an old saying that I have internalized (and that I probably have wrong) “If you don’t talk people may only think you’re stupid, unless you open your mouth and prove them true.” So I tend not to say much both in real life and on blogs. My new boss has pegged me as an “observer,” which is a rather accurate assessment. . .
I have a huge inferiority complex, haven’t you been able to tell? A lot of times I think I know just enough to sound really stupid to people who actually know what I am trying to say. A lot of times, I will know what I want to say, but struggle to find the appropriate words. The picture will be in my head, but I just can’t say what it is. . .
It is really frustrating and I feel really bad about it. I think part of it is not having enough confidence – I know lots of people who are just wrong, wrong, wrong, but they say things in such a way that sounds really intelligent, if you know what I mean . . .
. . . This is going to be a beautiful and very busy weekend. I am really hoping that we get to the nursery tomorrow and buy some plants for the balcony – I feel the need to nurture at the moment. I also hope we finally get a wireless router so I can actually use my laptop as a mobile workstation, instead of being chained to the desk in the den. The den isn’t big enough for both Mr. Random and I to sit in there at the same time . . .
. . . The studio idea is on hold, but not off of the table. Last weekend we talked to some actual artists to ask about where they know of studio space and most of them said they either work out of their homes (they have enough space to do so) or find spaces in marginal neighborhoods and share the rent with 3 or 4 people. One of our desires is to have a space near where we live so that we can get to it easily and actually get a lot of use out of the space, but given those parameters it will take us forever to find a spot . . .
. . . National Poetry Month is ending. I’m sure you all will be glad to not have to see any more of my horrid attempts at poetry. I do have some decent raw material to work from should I ever wish to improve. From now on, I’ll go back to spotlighting the random cool poets and poems that I find in my wanderings. Trying to write a poem every day during National Poetry Month has increased my appreciation for the hard work that goes into crafting a good poem . . .
This is a first for me, but it seems like it should happen much more often. When people first take the placement test, anything could happen – they could be having a bad day, be very distracted or the evaluator could interpret their answers differently and as a result someone could end up with a lower placement score than reflects their true proficiency level. Also, the test does not test reading and writing skills very well, so you could place out of the program with excellent oral skills, but still not be able to read or write English very well at all. (As is the case with one of the folks who just placed out.) The organization is supposed to be looking at implementing a new assessment tool, but I have no idea when that will be. It is also hard to get a lot of reading and writing instruction in when you are only dealing with people 2 hours a night, twice a week, with volunteer instructors. The students are always asking for more conversation, pronunciation and vocabulary skills to help them interact better with native speakers and allow them to get better jobs.
The student who placed out of the program with poor reading and writing skills has been matched with a one-on-one tutor, who will work with him exclusively on his reading and writing – so I am very happy that he will continue to get the help he needs . . .
. . . I am a lousy commenter on other people’s blogs. Usually when I read other blogs, I only have time to sneak a peak. Other times, I don’t feel confident enough to comment. There is an old saying that I have internalized (and that I probably have wrong) “If you don’t talk people may only think you’re stupid, unless you open your mouth and prove them true.” So I tend not to say much both in real life and on blogs. My new boss has pegged me as an “observer,” which is a rather accurate assessment. . .
I have a huge inferiority complex, haven’t you been able to tell? A lot of times I think I know just enough to sound really stupid to people who actually know what I am trying to say. A lot of times, I will know what I want to say, but struggle to find the appropriate words. The picture will be in my head, but I just can’t say what it is. . .
It is really frustrating and I feel really bad about it. I think part of it is not having enough confidence – I know lots of people who are just wrong, wrong, wrong, but they say things in such a way that sounds really intelligent, if you know what I mean . . .
. . . This is going to be a beautiful and very busy weekend. I am really hoping that we get to the nursery tomorrow and buy some plants for the balcony – I feel the need to nurture at the moment. I also hope we finally get a wireless router so I can actually use my laptop as a mobile workstation, instead of being chained to the desk in the den. The den isn’t big enough for both Mr. Random and I to sit in there at the same time . . .
. . . The studio idea is on hold, but not off of the table. Last weekend we talked to some actual artists to ask about where they know of studio space and most of them said they either work out of their homes (they have enough space to do so) or find spaces in marginal neighborhoods and share the rent with 3 or 4 people. One of our desires is to have a space near where we live so that we can get to it easily and actually get a lot of use out of the space, but given those parameters it will take us forever to find a spot . . .
. . . National Poetry Month is ending. I’m sure you all will be glad to not have to see any more of my horrid attempts at poetry. I do have some decent raw material to work from should I ever wish to improve. From now on, I’ll go back to spotlighting the random cool poets and poems that I find in my wanderings. Trying to write a poem every day during National Poetry Month has increased my appreciation for the hard work that goes into crafting a good poem . . .
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