Chomping at the Bit

I’ve had a lot of caffeine today, so I’m pretty hyper. I’ve been trying to wean myself from caffeine entirely, but over the last couple of months I’ve been so stressed out and tired that it’s been “Bring on the Diet Cokes and Diet Dr. Peppers!”

Thanks everyone for the kind words for my announcement – I has helped a bit to put words to paper of what I want to do. And as I told Mommanator in the comments, whenever I AM finally pregnant, I will clearly mark the post as such!

The whole “having a baby” thought was one of the topics holding up my decision. I’m not getting any younger – I’ll be 37 in two months – and if I’m going to do either, I felt like I really couldn’t wait any longer. So if I do get pregnant while I’m in school – and it is a serious possibility – Mr. Random and I decided that we will cross that bridge when we come to it.

Given how important Mr. Random and I think that education is, it behooves me to practice what I preach. I know that whatever child we have will always be surrounded by people who love reading and learning and being involved in the world, and I would hope that that rubs off on them in some way. I know it certainly did with my parents . . .

Both my parents went to college in the evenings while I was a little girl. I remember spending lots of evenings at my grandma’s house while both of them attended class. I remember always seeing big textbooks lying around and I would try to read them (and sometimes draw in them . . . oops!) I remember a few times, if my Grandma couldn’t watch me, my mom would bring me to class with her and have me sitting in a seat next to her, coloring and reading while the professor lectured. I made sure to stay very quiet and stay in my seat (in which my little legs were usually much too short to reach the floor!)

I remember when each of my parents graduated and seeing them wearing black robes and “flat hats.” They worked incredibly hard to get where they are and as I get older I appreciate even more the sacrifices they made to finish their educations. I guess it is partially for them that I try to finish – for them and for my future children.

Most of all, however, I have to finish for ME . . . so I know that I can . . . That’s the part that finally got my fanny in gear after all of these years . . .

Now that thought has to sustain me through the next several years. Do I have the true will to do so? I really hope I do . . .