Question of the Day

This was a question posed by my good friend, J, and I wondered how people would answer:

Why is it considered rude to talk on a cell phone in a restaurant?

If you had someone sitting across the table from you, you could talk to them and nobody would feel the least bit bothered. But if the person you're talking to happens to be in another state, suddenly you're boorish and insensitive. Why is that?

I think it's kind of rude, but I have trouble articulating why . . . it just is.

I theorize that the cell phone rings are irritating to many people who are trying to quietly enjoy their meals. People who talk on cell phones usually talk louder than normal, which is also disruptive to those around them.

When you talk to someone across from you, it is considered normal dining conversation – usually held at a normal tone of voice. Even it is loud, people can and do give you dirty looks and tell you both to keep it down.

A person talking on the cell phone? You only hear one side of the conversation. It makes people feel uncomfortable in ways that face-to-face conversations, for the most part, do not. (Unless it’s a heated argument or a drunken harangue, which sometimes can be considered free street theater.) Besides, what’s so darn important that you have to chat about it on the phone in a public place . . .

Which leads to why it annoys people so much – people hate cell phones anyway. It is another conduit of people bringing their private lives and dirty laundry into the public sphere: a loud, obnoxious MySpace page that people can’t block out of their range of hearing.

What do you guys think?

Yom HaShoah

For the dead AND the living, we must bear witness.

--Elie Wiesel

I was going to write a blog post about my experiences at the United States Holocaust Museum, but I simply could not do my thoughts and emotions justice. I am humbled by the enormity of it all. I am rendered speechless and angry and upset.

Today is International Holocaust Memorial Day, described by Wikipedia as:

In a unanimous vote, the United Nations General Assembly voted on November 1, 2005, to designate January 27 as the "International Day of Commemoration in Memory of the Victims of the Holocaust." January 27, 1945 is the day that the former Nazi concentration and extermination camp of Auschwitz-Birkenau was liberated. Even before the UN vote, January 27 was already observed as Holocaust Memorial Day in the United Kingdom since 2001, as well as other countries, including Sweden, Italy, Germany, Finland, Denmark and Estonia. Israel observes Yom HaShoah vea hagvora, the "Day of Remembrance of the Holocaust and the courage of the Jewish people ," on the 27th day of the Hebrew month of Nisan, which generally falls in April. This memorial day is also commonly observed by Jews outside of Israel.

[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holocaust]

From the Museum Website:

The United Nations General Assembly designated January 27 as an annual, international day of remembrance, by official resolution on November 1, 2005. The resolution urges every member nation to honor the memory of Holocaust victims and encourages the development of educational programs about Holocaust history as part of the resolve to help prevent future acts of genocide.

The UN resolution rejects denial of the Holocaust, and condemns discrimination and violence based on religion or ethnicity.

[http://www.ushmm.org/museum/exhibit/focus/ihrd/]

If you can today, please take a moment to remember those who perished and those who survived. Let us promise to speak up and speak out against injustice, violence and discrimination in all forms, against anyone.

First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out –

Because I was not a socialist.

Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out –

Because I was not a trade unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out –

Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me – and there was no one left to speak for me.

-- Attributed to Martin Niemöller (1892-1984), anti-Nazi German pastor

Piping Up

I’ve been laid low for the past few days after finally catching Mr. Random’s bad cold.

I’ve spent most of the time intermittently sleeping and watching all of the episodes of “Heroes” online – it’s quite an absorbing show, I was pleasantly surprised. Watching 6 episodes in a row also made it a lot easier to pick up on different connections. I guess this is what people experience when they get the DVDs for shows that they didn’t watch the first time, like “Buffy” or “24.” I’m not a big TV person, some I still clueless about a lot of shows – I don’t even watch American Idol – I just keep up with shows by reading the recaps in the paper, on blogs and on Television without Pity – it’s sometimes more entertaining that way . . .

I have a bigger post to write about my visit on Saturday to the Holocaust Museum – my friend, J, and I were there for over 5 hours and it was an overwhelming experience – one that takes a while to process the enormity of it all. It is one thing to read about what happened, but it is another to see and hear what went on . . . and to know how much or how little could have stopped everything from happening. It angered me, learning how much our country knew about what was going on and how our government did nothing to help – it even put roadblocks in the way of saving more people . . . to learn about all of the actions that lead up to the “final solution” and how many citizens just let it happen and how many were complicit . . . it all raises so many questions in my brain . . . and a resolve to do what I can to make others aware so that it doesn’t happen again . . . even though it IS happening again . . . what CAN one person do? . . .

All I know is that in my last post I talked about the need to speak up . . . and going to the museum on Saturday cemented that resolve to speak up about these seemingly piddly little work things . . .

For if you don’t start speaking up about the little things, how will one ever be able to stand up an speak up about the really big things that need attention?

Dealing with the Naked Emperor

Yesterday was a particularly craptastic day at the Random Non-Profit – one of those days where things start out poorly and just go downhill. However, a lot of my unhappiness was very self-inflicted, so I can’t really blame the day . . .

I tend to get very intimidated when I am around people who are supposedly experts and have a great deal more knowledge about topics than I do. If I am in a meeting and I hear something or notice something that is not quite right, I have a tendency to keep it to myself and think that I am the only person not getting it. But after the meeting is over and I have time to think about the situation some more, I realize that there was something off and that I should have spoken up and said something . . .

Part of the problem is that when I can tell something is illogical, I can’t quite place my finger on why at that exact moment – I usually have to chew on the proceedings for a while. I mean, I could stand up and say “something is wrong here!” but then when asked what it is, I’d have to say “I’m not sure . . . but there is something off, I swear!” and that just looks stupid. And if there is one thing I try to avoid at all costs, that is looking stupid. There is a saying that goes along the lines of “If you sit there, people may think you are stupid, but if you open your mouth, people will know it’s true.” I just prefer not to open my mouth unless I know exactly what I want to say . . .

This problem is doubly present when there are “elders” or people who I feel are above me in the room. Now, at this point in my life I know that just because you have a bunch a degrees by your name, or that you are a few years older than me, does not necessarily mean that you know what you are talking about at any given time (because heaven knows I’ve met lots of people who certainly don’t) but I guess it was always ingrained in me to be deferential to others. Plus, I generally have low self-esteem about my own talents so I tend to not want to contradict what people say in public . . .

It is so hard in an office environment to know what to say and what not to say, to know who might get offended and who might actually be glad you pointed out that something was wrong . . .

The really irksome thing about all of this is that I was talking to a co-worker after one of the meetings yesterday about something I thought had been handled incorrectly and that person had thought something similar, but she didn’t say anything either. What is up with us? Somebody needs be able to step up and say the emperor has no clothes . . .

I still have so much to learn . . . big sigh . . .

New Random Pictures

Hey, everyone . . .

Just uploaded a few more pictures to Flickr (finally!) so they should be showing up in the Random Snapshots box once in while. I've taken a few more pictures with Eddie (the new camera) recently, but I'm only posting a few here . . .

There are a few I would LOVE to put up, but I don't know if the person I took them of would be all that cool with it . . .

I love taking pictures of people - if done well, their personality comes shining through and you can get a taste of what a person is like . . .

I've been having a crazy busy week - last night was my first night back teaching ESL for the semester - I have totally new students this time and I'll probably end up having 6 students each night, rather than the 8 to 10 I've had the last few semesters. This means I'll have to prepare a lot more material for each class period, since with fewer people we'll end up going through the lessons much faster . . .

Will write more soon . . .

Sunday Random Meditation

Sometimes you wake up and realize something you knew all along but just weren't paying attention enough to notice what it was . . .

Sometimes after you realize it, you then are faced with having to make the other parts of your life support that knowledge . . .

Sometimes you want change to happen immediately, but life doesn't - and can't - work that way . . .

How does one keep the faith in your gained knowledge when it feels like everything is conspiring not to let you achieve what you need to achieve? What is to keep you from saying "Oh, screw it. Let's just keep on keeping on . . ."

These are not entirely theoretical questions . . . but I'm just trying to figure things out in my head again. Sometimes I think I live too much in my head. (But it's so comfy! . . . although not helpful in getting things done . . .)

I just have to be paitent, but I don't want to . . . waaaah!

Gee, am I vague enough for you? I promise I'll let you all know once things are actually decided and in motion, otherwise, I feel like putting words to cyberspace would commit me to things I'm not ready to even speak aloud yet . . .

Let's just say it is another stepping stone to me finally being the me I want to be . . .

Rearranging the Deck Chairs

As you can see I’ve been adding some new links to the sidebar, in my perpetual quest to keep things fresh here at the Random Blog. You can also tell I’ve been adding more pictures – although, no one ever said they would be GOOD pictures . . .

Of course, just as soon as I add some links, I find out that have to take some down. I must have the reverse Midas touch – whenever I discover a really great blog, that is the exact moment that the blogger decides to call it quits . . .

A lot of bloggers have been doing this pretty much everyday for several years now and they just can’t keep up the production – if you get a lot of regular readers, those people seem to expect constant, well-written posts which are hard to sustain if you have full life with other responsibilities and activities . . .

I’m in nowhere near the same league as a lot of the well-known bloggers, but I don’t think I’ll be burnt out from doing this any time soon:

First off, it isn’t that well-written. Most of the time, either I can sit and wordsmith and edit and make the post a beautiful work of art, or I can actually post something. I tend towards posting, otherwise there would only be about 10 posts on this blog . . .

Secondly, despite my best efforts I am not able to post every day. You know the deal – the Random Non-profit job, volunteering, meetings, husband, family, friends, excursions, manic Random cat pesterings . . .

Thirdly, much of the stuff on here is pretty random and I doubt that I’ll stop having angst and/or adventures anytime soon – in fact, if things work out the way I hope this year, I may have even MORE to write about (but less time to do so.)

Besides, I want to keep in touch with all of you guys – my faithful, but few, readers. Most of you I have never met in real space, but through your blogs your writings make me want to know you and worry about you and be your friends and learn from you. You’ve exposed me to so many different experiences and viewpoints, I feel so lucky to have stumbled into your lives . . .

And if one day you decide to give up the blog, just know that I will always be eternally grateful for your sharing your life with us all . . .

Meet Eddie . . .

Oh . . . by the way . . . this is Eddie, the newest member of the Random camera family. It was a Christmas gift from Mr. Random, with help from some elves from his family.

It’s an awesome digital camera – a Canon EOS Digital Rebel XT – and this type of camera has a mode where you can take pictures directly in Black and White and not have to worry about using Photoshop. (I *hate* with the white heat of a thousand suns the Photoshopping of pictures . . . it’s just so . . . wrong . . .)

I haven’t been able to use it yet, but I am looking forward to starting a new project very soon. Although, first I have to get comfortable with all of the buttons and settings – it is not exactly a simple point-focus-shoot-light-tight-box machine. I also need to get a much better lens – I usually work with a 85 mm and this one is an 18-55 mm, which drives me bats because I am used to shooting objects and people that look closer than they are. Also, an 85 mm lens is best for shooting portraits – which is something I am very interested in doing in the future.

It was one of the most wonderful presents I could ever get! Thanks so much, Mr. Random!

Un-Decking the Halls

Yesterday was a melancholy day for the Random Household. The Holiday season is now officially over, so Mr. Random and I spent part of Sunday afternoon removing all of the ornaments from the Christmas tree, taking down the lights and garlands and little accessories that decorated the condo, boxing everything up and putting those boxes away for another year . . .

It is a bit poignant to know that the season is over and that things have to go back to “normal” – whatever “normal” is. No more of the parties and decorations and extended days off that characterize the season – the easy-going atmosphere, the flexibility, the built-in excuses for connecting with family and friends – all of that gone and replaced by the relentless beat of “must get done, must finish.”

This is going to be an important, seminal year for me . . . I can feel it in my bones. However, I don’t know if this is a good development or a bad development and that tension . . . well, it’s a nervous feeling of expectation . . . that will be driven by actions that *I* set into motion, which makes it even scarier . . .

One worry is that it was confirmed that my sister is definitely going to be deployed to Iraq in March. My little sister! She won’t be able to come home before she goes overseas, so Friday was the last time I would see her in person for a while – having lunch with her, I tried to keep my fear and despair ducked down deep so that we could enjoy the day. She is very rational about the whole thing, although I know that she is worried, but she knows that her worry and fear will not be helpful to her getting through the experience. I need to learn to be able to do that too . . . but I am petrified! I don’t want to lose her. I don’t want to see her changed. I don’t want her to go . . .

So I must stay busy and keep my mind off of it. My classes start again next week, so it is time to dust off the old ESL lesson plans and see what tweaking needs to be done. Last Thursday was our Volunteer Teachers’ meeting and I presented one of my lesson plans to the group. It was very well received and the staff thought that I did an excellent job of the organization and the incorporation of many different elements into the plan. It felt good to have that validation! A lot times I feel as if I have no idea of what I am doing, but after almost 3 years and much trial and error, I think I actually do have a good handle on what should be happening in a classroom setting. It makes me rethink whether this is something I may want to pursue for pay someday – as in, teaching ESL to adults in the evenings. Something to think about as I continue to make plans for the rest of the year . . .

News flash! Mr. Random’s Mom wants to come visit us again in April. She wants to see the National Cathedral, go to Politics and Prose, and generally do more sightseeing during a season when it is a little less humid. She’s also getting a bit bored and antsy in retirement, which I think is the prime motivation for this trip. She’d be staying with us for a week again . . . Heaven help us all . . .

I really want to take a decent vacation this year, but with Mr. Random having grad-school classes all year, even in the summer, that may not be an option. If there was time, then there would be no money . . .

It’s raining here today, which is not helping my mood at all. A vendor is coming by the Random Non-Profit this afternoon, bringing a free lunch – which is something to look forward to, but will probably end up being deli sandwiches, which are usually dry. I do hope they have chips and/or brownies too . . .

It’s sometimes the little things which bring joy . . .

What I Did New Year's Day . . .

It's not the best picture . . . but you get the idea.

Gee, the new year is only five days old and I seem to have already fallen down on the “more reading, more writing, more pictures” goal. I DO still have another 51 weeks to go, so I’m not too worried . . . yet.

J and I did go out to have a new year’s lunch on Monday, and afterwards I somehow ended up at in the Capitol Rotunda, viewing the casket of former President Ford. Quite the romp through the surreal it was, combining two of my least favorite pastimes – standing in long lines and getting “frisked” by security . . .

Well, first we were just going to go down to “see the scene” and scout out the activities. I had no desire to go to this event at all – I was not able to go view Thurgood Marshall when he was lying in honor at the Capitol, and I did not see Rosa Parks – and these are two people whose actions arguably meant much more to my life and that of many others, than those of the late President. Then J said, “well, let’s see how long the line is.” Then, “Hey, the line seems to be moving – let’s stand in it and see what happens.” At this point, I knew what was going on, but I also knew that J really wanted to do this, so I played along. I also made sure to show my utter annoyance at having to stand in line for – OK, it was under an hour and a half, so it wasn’t horrible – but who wants to spend the first day of the new year at what equals a funeral? However, my signs of annoyance seemed to amuse J to no end – why do people have such fun making me miffed?

Above is the card that the Capitol staff passed out to each person as we entered the Rotunda. If you have never been inside, it is a very cool and awe inspiring experience, only marred by the large riser of cameras and photographers that stood off to the side, filming the proceedings. There was not time to stop and take a moment – the line moved quickly towards, around and past the casket – we could not have spent more than 30 seconds in the place . . .

After leaving the rotunda, a representative of each visiting party was encouraged to sign one of the condolence books and since J, in the teen years, was the one who had met the President, J was the one who signed the book . . .

I am glad that I went – it did feel like a significant moment, a part of history, a paying of respect to the past. Everyone should be able to experience something like this once in their life – and by living so close to DC, I really need to take these opportunities more often . . .

Besides, President Ford did have a quiet integrity that is so rare to find in public figures these days . . .

I am not a saint, and I am sure I have done things I might have done better or differently, or not at all. I have left undone things I should have done. But I believe and hope I have been honest with myself and others, that I have been faithful to my friends and fair to my opponents, and that I have tried my very best to make this great Government work for the good of all Americans.

-- Gerald R. Ford

Auld Lang Syne – Looking Back at the Blog in 2006

There was a meme going around for a while where you posted the first sentence that you wrote on your blog each month for the past year. Today seemed a rather appropriate day to do so . . .

January: Happy New Year, everyone! Tomorrow the vacation is over, we jump into the fray again. Today I had lunch with my friend, J, at an Afghan place nearby. J, if you are reading this, I send a cheery wave hello!

(side note: we’re going to lunch today, too – a rather nice tradition of sorts. I send another cheery wave hello, J!)

February: I've been swamped with work and other stuff this week, so I haven't been able to post much. I have been thinking of you all, though . . .

(side note: This seems to be a common theme throughout the year – I actually posted less this year than last year. One of my goals this year is to write more often and write more thoughtfully.)

March: . . . Tonight, 10 PM ET on Discovery Health, the show "Rebuilt" - if you watch you may see Mr. Random, he's on the subject's coed soccer team, they are all wearing orange team shirts. We haven't seen the show yet, but if you think you can pick out who Mr. Random is let me know and I'll tell you if you've guessed right. He would probably be very distinctive . . . the hint is the color of his socks . . .

(side note: He was on, but it was hard to tell – you could see the flash of his red socks, though . . .)

April: For Day 1 of "30 Days of Poetry," you're supposed to do Concrete Poetry - using words and their physical formation to create poetry. However, I don't have a scanner here, so there's no way I could draw a picture sufficient to demonstrate this type of poetry, so I've gone to the old standby - Haiku - to start the first day of Poetry Month.

(side note: Man, the poems that month really sucked. I really need to do better about that this year. I should probably read a lot more poetry before I attempt this again . . .)

May: I have not forgotten about you all . . . It’s just been super busy these days and I have not much time to write. I’m glad to see that Virginia Gal is back, wanted to say “Hi” to Merci and Justrose, and give a shout out to Tree of Knowledge who wandered over from Cheese and Responsibility (which needs to go on the blogroll as soon as I have time.)

(side note: Love the shout outs! Also want to say hi to Dean Dad and Eric, who also come over from time to time . . .)

June: This morning I forgot to take my allergy pill, which meant that by lunchtime I was a stuffy, sneezing mess. I keep an over-the-counter allergy pill in my desk for just such an emergency, but the pill always makes my extremely sleepy within a half-hour of taking it. I have to be incredibly desperate to want to take it, and with all of the conference preparations going on, I had to weigh whether or not I’d rather be sleepy or sneezy. I picked “sleepy” and hoped for the best.

(side note: This past year at work was such as mixed bag, heading on a downhill slope of satisfaction, and next year looks to be just as stormy for me unless I can change a few things . . .)

July: Question of the day, relating to the past Fourth of July holiday. I’m borrowing from Marginal Revolution – sue me, I have a thing for economists . . . (http://www.marginalrevolution.com/marginalrevolution/2006/07/would_i_have_su.html) Let’s pretend that we are all living around 1773 or so. The American Revolution is fermenting here in the colonies. You are just a normal person, like you are today. You do not have the benefit of hindsight or can see into the future at all. Would you have supported the revolution, or sided with the British?

(side note: Ooooh! I actually liked this question!)

August: The Random Mother-in-law is in residence this week. The Random Household is tidier than it has been in . . . well, years. The new paint in the bathroom has been touched up, new shower curtains purchased, matching towels adorning the towel racks, and my sea of random lotions and sprays has been taken off of the counters and put neatly into shelves and cabinets.

(side note: Thus began my week from Hell – the hottest, most humid week of the year, stuck in the small condo with my husband and mother-in-law. I want my week of vacation back!)

September: I finished Until I Find You last night – the last fourth of the book was just torture to me, I could barely make myself read the last 20 pages. It was going so well, and I was getting so much out of it, but the ending just seemed so lame and predictable and disappointing. I do recommend the book for most of it, just skip the last section – trust me, you’ll feel better for it . . . unless you really need to see everything resolved, then you probably will finish it, but be forewarned . . .

(side note: I didn’t get as many books read as I had hoped, and that is a big goal for me this year.)

October: Yesterday, Mr. Random and I went to the final Washington Nationals baseball game of the season. I love going to baseball games – they are so much fun to watch in person, especially when you have really involved fans around you. It was Frank Robinson’s last game managing the Nats, temporarily ending his 51st year in baseball – His farewell was quite moving and I was so happy to have been there to see it. I do hope he gets some sort of front office position, because who can imagine him just sitting at home when the new season starts . . .

(side note: That was one of the highlights of my year, being at that game . . .)

November: Ladies and gentlemen, It’s that time of year again! National Novel Writing Month begins today.

(side note: See December)

December: NaNoWriMo is now over and I only wrote less than 5,000 words out of 50,000 for the month of November. Actually, that’s pretty good news, since it was the most writing I have ever been able to finish in a month, outside of this blog. In fact, I will credit the blog for helping me a great deal with this year’s project, since now I am at least posting once or twice a week. While I cannot put a winner sticker on my blog, I am proud to have the participant icon and seeing it will mean a great deal to me now. Let’s aim for at least 10,000 words in 2007!

(Side note: Ending in optimism! Awesome! That’s what I need to remember to keep doing for all of this year – being less cranky and more hopeful . . .)